Bloodstainedpetals

-DONE-

2005-10-19T12:19:00.000+08:00

http://bloodstainedpetals.blogspot.com IS NO LONGER IN USE.

This blog was meant for my very own rantings, humour and personal perspectives and expressions of thoughts and feelings.

However, some STUPID, IMMATURE PIECES OF SHIT had to kill my enthusiasm for blogging here.

Thank you very much, I now have an extremely good reason to move on and go on blogging hiatus.

And no, it's not that i'm SCARED or EMBARRASSED or GUILTY of the comments posted on this contaminated tag-board. If I was, I wouldn't even speak up and dare to say, "SAY IT TO MY FACE."

I'm just sick and fed up of the STUPID FUCKED UP AIRHEAD LOSER anons who don't even fucking dare leave their bloody names. Even when I KNOW exactly who they are. Pure essence of the word "S-T-U-P-I-D".

As I have said before, I am WHO I am, and I'm happy the way I am. Why? Because I'm not guilty of any POINTLESS and INEXPLAINABLE accusations. Some people have so much pride that they resort to blaming others for their own failure and faults. They're forgiven, but I'll NEVER FORGET.

I can try to improve and change WHAT I am, but even if I do so, it's absolutely not for ANYBODY but MYSELF. geddit?

I'd already put all the commotion that's happened in the past week behind me, but I'm just back to make known ONCE AND FOR ALL my final thoughts and conclusions.

I know those IMMATURE people are gonna take these words once again and turn them around for "good" use as insults to me.... but hey, I really don't care, and it does not bother even a breath of the air surrounding me. Those cuts you try to inflict will never create wounds and leave scars on me. It just goes to show that MY WORDS have an impact on people, which only serves to boost my ego.

I've stated the necessary points LOUD AND CLEAR. As for those of YOU who are gonna return with nasty comments, please refrain, or if you deem fit, go ahead, I KNOW I INTRIGUE YOU. Because anyway, THIS BLOG IS NO LONGER IN USE. So you'll be making a fool of yourselves, 'cos no one will be bothered with this "post-less" blog anymore.

Done. Goodbye. =)

Dreyer's Chocolate Cake ice-cream rawkz!

2005-10-13T10:47:00.000+08:00

Dreyer's Chocolate Cake-flavoured ice-cream.

thick chocolate ice-cream filled with pieces of chocolate cake and fudge swirls.

topped off with Chipsmore bite-sized chocolate chip cookies.

i had that for breakfast.

a MAJOR sin or what?

hahaha. reminds me of my all-time favourite Chocolate Freckles Peak at Swensen's. and how i used to get it free from Azrin (one of the supervisors) when i was working at Bugis Junction. he'd always add extraextra Chipsmore bite-sized chocolate chip cookies for me, cos he knew i loved them.

so sweet rite?

but we didn't work out. not my type larh. o what the hell. hahaha.

i gotta leave for work at 12pm.

Thank God i'm off tmr!! =D

diu lei lo mo??

2005-10-12T21:20:00.000+08:00

poor me.

i seem to have offended a lot of people. unknowingly and unintentionally.

i get offensive tags from cowards who hide behind stupid pseudonyms like "diu lei".

how fucked up can ppl get? and the best thing is, i'm 100-fucking-% sure i know these ppl.

and how the hell did DARYL QUAH come into the picture? he has nothing to do with my life, and vice versa.

o, and might i add that i'm not as bothered by my weight as i appear to be. calling someone FAT is just childish. no, i should say immature. childish is just above the suface. immaturity is the stuff which makes you.

i don't need to justify myself. i live for my own glory. i am who i am, and what i am. i'm happy with the way i am, though of course there's always room for much improvement.

it takes a Bitch to know a Bitch; a Slut to call a Slut.

so, you think i'm a bitch-cum-slut? well then, if you're so bloody confident of your "Mr/Ms Perfect-and-Pure" status, why didn't you just hunt me down and say it to my face? that wld've affected me more than just a pathetic anonymous tag. and you obviously do not have a life, otherwise you wouldn't be a tad bothered with the life of this loser/slut/bitch/sucker Miss Khor Xiuyi, Sarah.

remember the saying which goes, "bad publicity is also good publicity"? in fact, any type of publicity simply brings about one conclusion:

people are interested in ME and MY life.

so you heard that i'm a hussy who sleeps around? wow. i never knew i was so desirable. because remember, even if a girl is cheap, it doesn't necessarily mean that a lot of guys would take her. Why Thank You for the compliment, Daahling.

and please, stop being jealous and irritated with me already. i can't help it if the guys think i'm oh-so-bed-able.

the most perfect people are the ones who are the most insecure.

it's fun being a Bitch. you get noticed.

i like it like that. =)

P.S. if you're tired of your pathetic sex life, feel free to fuck your parents, honey. it's a free world. =)

-backbreaking

2005-10-11T22:20:00.000+08:00

only ONE word to describe shift work as a sales assistant at Zara: BACKBREAKING

i'm here to complain.

_my back is aching
_my legs are breaking (try standing, walking, squatting and running for 10 hrs straight)
_my calf muscles are growing bigger & stronger from all the "leg-exercises" mentioned above (damn un-ladylike & chunky! i wanna keep them slender!)
_my waist is expanding from the irregular/inconsistent meals due to the nature of shift work. (dinner break is just 3-4 hrs away from lunch, which is far too early, and by the time i get hm i'm hungry all over again)
_pimple breakout (that's why i HATE make-up)
_dark circles and eyebags (u get hm at 12am from work, get to slp only at 1 am or later, and then you have to wake up at 6.30am to prepare for work)
_i'm broke (Damn you, Mother!!!)
_my mild eczema is getting worse and it's killing me! (thanks to the dust & chemicals from the clothes which irritate my ultra-sensitive skin- and that's why i HATE make-up)
_time is my enemy

there is nothing for me to be thankful for except the fact that i can go make-up free tmr- it's my 1st off-day from Zara!!! -sleepmunchslack

Shawn's on the phone. laters!

`OTC~

2005-10-09T22:30:00.000+08:00

work sux. but thank God for the supernice ppl. of course there are 1 or 2 bitches whom everyone loathes. we nicked name one of em OTC (otak tad centre - Malay for "mad"). i enjoy my time at work but i reali dread the looong workin hrs. time seems to pass by so slowly.

there's a searing pain which goes thru the joints at my knee, and my lower back aches like mad, whenever i stand for too long or walk/squat/run too much. and thats exactly what u do at Zara. the place is hell big, and the inventories are abundant, and finding/counting/retrieving stock is a quite a feat.

i signed a contract which states my commitment to RSH Limited until the 6th of Nov. so i cant quit. for the $$, it is worth it. i can do it. FULL-SHIFT tmr. -WHINES-

hmmm. i've been trying to pick up some Malay fr my colleagues. 90% of staff are made up of Malays & Malaysians. hahaha. rite now i onli noe e basic but being 1/4 Peranakan, i shall honour my roots & learn to speak Malay fluently. lalala.

o yess, i'm sooo gonna retake CMSY nx sem. didn mug for e sup. The Mother MUSN'T find out!! n i pray i wun hv to stae back 1/2 yr in Poly!! =(

i miss blogging, my freedom, my darling-friends, school, and The Mother.

dead tired. time for some quality time & catching up w gramma.

good night, darlings. <3

busybusybeeeee` !

2005-10-06T16:56:00.000+08:00

just bought a flowy laced white skirt from 77th Street at Compass Point... bohemian chick, you say? YAY!! but my grandma paid for me 1st, so now i owe her another $29.90, apart from the $50 for my work outfit. =(

i also checked out The Body Shop products at Heartland Mall, the nearest store I cld find to SengKang... i'm gonna get e Tea Tree Oil Concealer Stick and Waterproof Mascara in Black. o, not forgettin that green tube of Body Mask, Tea Tree Oil Nose Pore Mask, Deep Cleansing Peel- Off Facial Mask, and, if i finally manage to accept make-up as an inevitable essential in my life, the All-In-One Face Cake.

It's compulsory for Zara employees to smear on make up. I HATE MAKE UP. it's so troublesome to apply and remove... and not that i hv porcelain complexion... i'm afraid the cake and colours may suffocate and clog my already-oily pores further. plus, the dreadful ultra-sensitive skin. Problematic. BAH.

i need Retail Therapy badly. i swear i'll bring my sky-high fone bill down to zero & then i'll hv $$ to pamper myself. =)

just packed my wardrobe. I have far too many clothes. a bulk of which i dun wear anymore. i'm just too sentimental to throw away the old ones. o well... if the old ones dun go, the new ones dun come... until i get a ton more new clothes... heehee...

I HATE CLUTTER. neat freak, u may call me. my room is sparse and un-cosy. o WTH.

My Blogger "new post entry" window is back to normal!! *YAY!!!

hahaha ok i haven't started mugging for CMSY at all. i'm prepared to repeat e subject, seriously. it's actuali v easy to pass, IF YOU STUDY. my Mum has no idea tt i'm taking CMSY sup tmr. she's gonna kill me when she finds out i have to REPEAT the subject for a whole sem. i just hop i wun hv to stay back half a yr in Poly just to complete any subject at all!!! =(

i'm sooo hungry!! despite having had Roti Boy & Magnolia milk a few mins ago... wad a pig hahaha. contemplating followin Mummy, Grandma & Aunt out for dinner at the Singapore Swimming Club... but i need to START mugging for CMSY. how?? o no...

ok, my thoughts are all over e place ... i'm feelin hyper!!!

skippity loo, skippity loo
i need, i need some brand new shoes!

lalala.

craving for chocolate french donuts!!!

2005-10-05T14:58:00.000+08:00

busybusybee.

i'm so proud that yesterday, i managed to shop for a black shirt, black pants, and black shoes for my job at Zara, as well as my toiletries, all in one day. budget shopping! lovin' my new, suuper-comfy $20.70 Veeko black pants and $20 Bata black shoes from Compass Point. and i got a yellow tank top and 2 black tees fr Hang Ten at 3 for $15. hahaha. but my toiletries cost $74 in total. hair & body essentials. BAH.

was on the phone with The Mother aft shopping yesterday evening.

MOTHER: darling... where are you?

DAUGHTER: i'm at Compass Point... just bought my black outfit for work and my personal items.

M: orh... ok... so when do u start work and what are the working hours like? then u won't have time to see me any more arh?

D: Friday, 2pm... i hv 2 off-days a week... we'll meet up then larh dun worry... i have 2 full shifts, 9.30am-10.30pm, 2 aftnoon shifts, 2.30pm-10.30pm, and 1 morn shift, 9.30am-6.30pm. very jia-lat one lorh...

M: wah!! so looong arh? aiyo poor thing... ah boh u dun work larh... wa heng ler lui (i give u money) lorh... aiyo poor thing...

D: why? your heart pain arh? haha... nvm larh... i alr gave them my word... anyway the pay not bad... you can save this mth's allowance for our Europe tour nx yr... heh heh...

M: ya lorh ya lorh... ok lorh... so how much do I owe u for ur toiletries??

D: erm... $74 bucks in total.... i bought shampoo, conditioner, hair mask, body wash & moisturizer........

M: WHAT?? SO MUCH?? aiya ok larh ok larh.... so Mummy see u nx wk horr? ok??

D: okie... thanks Mummy... buh-bye...

do you notice the way i manipulate and get what I want without getting a shelling from The Mother? I made her feel guilty about forgoing my allowance this mth just bcos it's e hols. muahahah. but, you noe I LOVE YOU, Mummy. =)

class BBQ last nite was... alrite. but i hv to admit, though we're not v united as ONE and were spilt into our usual cliques, e chalet reali did help us build a stronger bond with one another. and the chicken wings were sooo gd that, for e 1st time in my life, i didn't mind getting my fingers soiled and downed more than 3 chicken wings at one go. and i lost $1 at black jack. we bet 10-cents. heehee.

i'm onli at the 1st set of CMSY notes. somebody stab me.

i'm craving for chocolate french donuts!! imagine warm, thick fudge oozing out of e centre of a chocolate rice-coated donut-bun... mmMm...

that explains the expanding waistline. =(

exhausted

2005-10-03T19:52:00.000+08:00

Joyce called me this aftnoon, informing me about my interview with Zara at their HR Dept at Liat Towers tmr, anytime from 12-2 pm.

I can't decide whether to laugh or cry. Reasons being...

1) 1/5 of my pay is going to foot my sky-high phone bill.

2) 1/4 of my pay will be used to pay for the black tops, black pants & black shoes that i hv to purchase for the job, as well as my meals. of course, i will eat little; using this chance to shrink the waistline and scrimp on my meals (what with the irregular eating hours) to save extra cash for the much needed, much awaited shopping spree with my babes.

3) I HATE LONG WORKING HOURS (imagine shift work from 10am-10pm; 12pm-10pm; 10am-7pm), AND I HATE RETURNING HOME LATE FROM WORK. I'll b dead beat by e time i reach hm, and i wun hv e energy or urge to bathe & complete my nightly facial/body-moisturising regime. also, no more MEEE time. RAH RAH RAH.

basically, i HATE working.

trust me, kids. many of u out there may b calling me a looney when u read this post, all eager to get your itching butts out there in the working world. it may seem fun oggling and handling beautiful clothes all day; typing away on the keyboard infront of the PC; or even salivating at the aroma of the food u serve as a waiter(ess); but working is seriously NO FUN. NO NO NO FUNNN. u get e picture.

went out w mum todae. she exasperated me by going on and on and on at the rate i'm spending money; how i shld learn to b thrifty - "the oppurtunity cost of a new piece of clothing you buy is the entire week's meals for a family of 5"; and how "MY millions have nothing to do with you. EARN YOUR OWN millions". BAH.

the only thing worth my smile today is the fact that i enjoyed my yummy Billy Bomber's lunch: Fish'n'Fries, cheese-dip and chocolate milkshake. Mmmmm.

i've been too lazy to jog or do crunches or push-ups. and pretty soon, i reali wun hv e time or energy at all, once i start work at Zara.

those of you who have to take CMSY sup paper & hv not touched ur notes at all, join my club.

my LACK OF DISCIPLINE is the bane of my existence.

noodles r my favourite!!!

2005-10-02T16:47:00.000+08:00

lazy sunday aftnoon as usual.

I MISS O.Y.S. hahaha. too much of a secret to spell out his full name. silly crushes. heehee.

i love Kwan Sang Woo. peeps, go watch Stairway To Heaven & Sad Love Story. do prepare your tissue boxes!!! -sobs-

going for a jog ltr bout 6pm. i'm too lazy larh... but i need to lose weight!

i'm getting worried bout CMSY sup paper. mum's bringin me out tmr. class chalet on tues, wed, thurs. sup paper on Fri. where got time to study?? tt's 4 more days, excluding todae. i dun think i'll b staying over at e chalet. gotta find time to study. BAHHH. i swear, nx sem, i'm gonna pass ALL my papers w flying colours & ENJOY my hols PROPERLY.

i'm praying Zara'll call me soooon. i desperately neeeed a job. ARGH. my MUM is MEEEAAN. rich ppl are damn miserly larhh. well, fr my encounters, i shld think 90% of them are. grrr.

ok, my thoughts are all over e place.

i love my new hot-pink wristband! =)

the horrors of life...

2005-10-01T22:35:00.000+08:00

been thinking a lot lately. misty memories and careless thoughts incessantly ringing in my head.

i'm amazed at how the world works. all of us have different lives to lead; cursed or blessed; poor or rich; complicated or simple; thrilling or mundane. mine is.... well... a hopeless contradiction.

thru e years, i've seen the way i've moulded into a whole new person... from incorrigible to obedient; wildchild to sensibleyounglady.... and i'm still working on the EQ part. but i must say, i've come a long way, in the sense of exuding a MAJOR problematic attitude. trust me, people can see and sense the change in me from my CHIJ TP days.

frens & best frens come and go; nice ones turn ugly; ugly ones turn into angels; naive ones are now getting out of hand. the wonders and mysteries of life never fail to intrigue my curiousity. i wonder where this road would have taken us, 10 years later.

i met up with an acquaintance tonight. found out that he's actuali a v v nice guy. but, too bad. our lifestyles clash. yup, he's an owl. i'm an owl who's pathetically caged up. heehee.

goodnight.

P.S. i pray Zara employs meee!!! =D I MISS JOYCE TIANG.

car crashes

2005-09-30T21:23:00.000+08:00

there's sth wrong w the f***ing "create a new post" window whenever i log on to Blogger. wth.

clearly, there is sth wrong w my mood as well. ok, fine, i admit, it's partly due to PMS. girls, u KNOW wad i mean. on top of that, i'm a desperate job-seeker wasting my time & money on phonecalls & newspapers, all to no avail. grrrr.

Shawn n i were discussing family probs, the ups & downs of life, as well as interesting, hot topics such as abortion & the fears we have about whether or not we will strike it big in the crude, cold adult-working world, in the near future.

Depression is back to haunt me. ask me why. my answer: I DON'T KNOW. well, of course i hv my reasons, but there are just too many; and my life is far too complicating and atrocious for any one out there to handle. besides, none of u out there wld understand anywae.

call me a weakling; call me spoilt; call me problematic. You don't know what SHIT i've been thru; u wil nv noe how it feels to live with permanent scars caused by wounds inflicted so deep into ur heart,mind&soul, so much so that it destroys ur well-being, and moulds you into someone you were never born to be. you either pick yourself up and become a stronger figure, or u lose it and degenerate into a wilted rose.

at this pt in time, i have not lost it yet. but i can feel my energy draining slowly; the pain of hopelessness gnawing at my spirit.... but i noe i'll recover fr this impulsive onset of low-self esteem, hopelessness and insecurity, eventually. just as i have done before.

i'll need God's help, seriously. Prayer, Faith, Prayer.

Car crashes, TV shows
A drunkard on the side of the road
People running
Fantasy or reality
Analysis and theories
What does matter, really?

Tell me what to believe
Won't you bring me order
Tell me what to achieve
Baby, so I can move forward
Tell me what to believe
Car crashes, TV shows
A drunkard on the side of the road
People runnin', run

Credit cards in place of distress
Go live your life on the Internet
That's what fills it
Conspiracies and mysteries
A science-fiction, make-believe
My kind's misery

Tell me what to believe
Won't you bring me order
Tell me what to achieve
Baby, so I can move forward
Tell me what to believe
Car crashes, TV shows
A drunkard on the side of the road
People runnin', run

Sun goes up
I go down
My values all turned inside-out
But I shall seek and I will find
A sun behind those mist of clouds
We weren't meant to give up

Tell me what to believe
Won't you bring me order
Tell me what to achieve
Baby, so I can move forward
Tell me what to believe
Car crashes, TV shows
A drunkard on the side of the road
People runnin', run

~All these car crashes in my head~

-Car crashes by Standfast

jobless, penniless and depressed

2005-09-29T16:42:00.000+08:00

this has been a fucked up dae.

mum picked grandma n i up this morn, went for lunch, fetched grandma to the salon in Toa Payoh, drove ard w mum & then we had this huge argument and i burst into tears, utterly embarrassed and horrified at how emotional i can get at times. mum was complaining and nagging the whole dae, going on and on about this ongoing "political" challenge and the endless disagreements btw her and my eldest aunt. great. and that was just one factor which ruined my Thursday aftnoon.

The Mother has decided to forgo my allowance of $XXX this mth bcos it's e hols, and i "have to learn how to curb my horrendous spending habits." all she gave me was $50 for transport and a meager sum to get by. WTF. she just sold her Nissan Sunny and Benz E220 for a Mitsubishi COLT and a new and more costly Benz, respectively. so, let's see. she has enuf cash to change 2 bloody LuXuRiOuS cars at one go, but she's too miserly to even spare me 1/2 my allowance?? wad e fuck is this world coming to?? and i reckon she's not gettin me a studio apt anytime soon, or prob nv will.

last but not least, things are soooo fucked up cos i cant seem to find a job (ok, i admit, i'm v fussy, but that's cos my previous jobs were SHIT n i'm too cynical to accept just any ol' job). i'm waving gdbye to my much-needed, much-expected shopping spree, wonderful, costly outings with my frens, as well as all other plans and gadgets which i'm just dying to get hold off. let's just hope The Mother'll b sympathetic enuf to fork out some extra $$ for my 18th bdae. very well, i shall take this chance and save $$ on my meals, and starve as much as my body can take. great wae to shed off a whole chunk of meat. =)

my eldest aunt's pickin grandma n i up at 6pm for Sakae Sushi dinner. no appetite larhh. n i dun wan my jogging/crunches/push-ups effort to go down e drain.

and my poor frens are having probs of their own. WTF WTF WTF. this has to b e WORST September of my Life.

oh, and add October to that, too.

nike baby

2005-09-27T17:16:00.000+08:00

kiddy ponytail

orange evening sun

purple/lime Nike sports bra

navy CHIJ TP house t-shirt & shorts

blueish Nike track shoes

and a heart-full of perseverance.

i'm off!!! =)

sports-girl wannabe

2005-09-26T22:44:00.000+08:00

as of today, i am a sports-whore wannabe.

ok, so i'm expert at shopping, eating, drinking, dancing, parties and what-nots... but one thing that has always been out of bounds is serious sports.

firstly, i'm afraid of sea water, and i can't swim properly for nuts despite having had lessons.

secondly, i'm afraid of ball games like basketball, netball, volleyball etc... but soccer and pool r one of my favourites! well, that's because there's less chance of the big, round, hard ball flying to ur face and knocking your teeth out. ouch. haha.

thirdly, as we all are too ashamed to admit, i'm too lazy to move about and sweat it out. yikes.

todae, Joyce, Ivan, Tim and I played badminton at Macpherson CC. it was fun, and i finally learnt how to play e game properly. though i'm still very lousy, i'm proud to sae, well, i picked up very fast. whoohoo.

tmr's plan was to go kayaking. but Ivan n Tim damn lousy LaRh... wad whole body aching and all that shit jus bcos of a few hrs of badminton. bleaghs. party-poopers! i was well on my wae to try my 2nd water sport! my first was dragon boating. now, that wld seriously get ur arms aching like an ah-ma. =P

and so i hereby declare my vow to master rollerblading, ice-skating, tennis, squash, regular and tedious, long jogs, and kayaking/canoeing within the mth of October, just b4 e hols come to an end. very ambitious, i noe.

but i can, and i will. what matters most is i want to. i wan a great body just like b4.

o wells. gd nite ppl. let's hope i can finally pull myself out of bed for a long, good morning run tmr!

perfect-yet-dreadful weekends for me

2005-09-25T14:33:00.000+08:00

Friday

dinner at chomp chomp with Joyce, Ivan & Mark. my perfect Friday night out. good food, good company... and the best thing of all, a rainbow drew across my darkened sky. i'm so happy to sae that things w my bestie/honeybear*Joyce & my bro*Ivan, as well as Mark, r back to normal. err... something like a kiss-and-make-up happy ending. except that onli Joyce & Ivan kissed each other... err, nothing else took place btw e rest of us. oh, WTH m i sayin?!?! =P

Saturday

met Tim at 12pm sharp at city hall mrt (for e 1st time this yr i was actuali punctual, despite my horrible time management). made our wae to Suntec to get Royce chocs and a "Sex-and-Money" card as a bdae gift for Shawn. on e wae at CityLink Mall, we checked out Godiva chocs. I had absolutely nooo idea that they seriously cost a BOMB. nooo wae i cld afford any of those. but i'm sure Mummy'll get me some if i behave myself. =)

had a great "tasting" session at Royce. e sales girl was kinda fed up w e "i-taste-but-doesn't-mean-i'll-buy" crowd. left e chocs at Royce (they cld only last 5 hrs outta e freezer) and went for lunch (yummy ramen @ the Fountain Food Terrace), puzzled as to how to pass 'em to Shawn, esp when he n i were gonna b out e whole nite. i mean, noone carries a refrigerator ard, rite?

made our wae to P.S. where we both wrote & signed e bdae card. aft which Tim left for guitar class @ Yamaha... i called Sam and realized that that bitch hadn't left her hse to collect e cake fr Prego @ Swissotel and leave it at Fish & Co. Glass Hse as a surprise celebration for Shawn that nite during dinner. and then i went on a "rendezvous".

-i dragged myself out of e chair, feet hurting fr my 1&1/2-inch babypink heels, sweating like a pig fr e unbelievably humid weather, and made my wae to Suntec, collected e Royce chocs,

-off to Prego, collected e 250gm Mango Mousse cake,

-went back to Dhoby Ghaut to leave e card, cake & chocs w Fish & Co. Glass Hse,

-and finally click-clacked my wae to United Square.

i strongly believe all that walking balanced out e calories gained fr dinner.

anywaes, it was worth every drop of sweat. Shawn was v happy. =)

got hm about 12 plus am. got reprimanded by my uncle. wtf. i've been thinkin bout many many things lately. i'd rather not share them, but let's just sae it's time for a MAJOR change. i'll need lotsa self-control, will-power & motivation. -BAH-

oh, and i just can't stand e fact tt my mum doesn't give a damn wad i do or where i go, but my friggin' uncle sets stoopid hse rules for me. "don't treat this hse as a hotel." WTF. get.a.life. i'm turning 18, i'm young, hip & fun, so y shldn't i b given all e liberty to party myself crazy?? I HATE RESTRICTIONS! dammit.

HUI TING: I'm praying u'll get e job. so that i can get a discount at Zara. hehehe. just kiddin! lotsa LoVe, sugababygirl. *hugs*

JOYCE: my honeybear... now haven't i updated my blog alr?? i miss chompchomp too!! but i miss u e mossst!! <3

failed CMSY

2005-09-23T16:05:00.000+08:00

Examination Results

Student : 0505157H KHOR XIUYI SARAH
Academic Year : 2005/2006, May Semester
Course : DIPLOMA IN BUSINESS INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY

Business Accounting 1 : C+

Communication Skills 1 : B

Macroeconomics : C

Computer Systems : F

Internet and Information Systems in Organisations : D+

Applied Principles for Effective Living 1 : Pass

Total Credit Units earned to-date : 18 cu

Cumulative Grade Point Average obtained to-date : 1.79

Academic Status: PERMITTED TO TAKE THE SUPPLEMENTARY EXAMINATION / ASSESSMENT.

i dunno whether to laugh or to cry.

1stly, i'm sooo grateful to God for letting me pass 3 outta 4 subjets. Amazing Grace. for e 1st time in my life, i truly understand the depth of that mellifluous sound.

2ndly, i'm horrified at the prospect of having to study all over again, plus even harder this time, for the impending CMSY supp paper. I HATE CMSY. and yes, I WILL STUDY HARD for this, lest my suicidal tendencies set in at news of having to REPEAT CMSY for a whole semester. =(

3rdly, SHIT happened last nite. and i feel like SHIT todae, but thank God the storm has more or less calmed down. things wil nv b e same again, but at least they can get better; much better. have heart, have faith, have courage, Sarah.

this world, this world is cold
but you don't, you don't have to go
you're feeling sad, you're feeling lonely
and no one seems to care
your mother's gone and your father hits you
this pain you cannot bear

but we all bleed the same way as you do
and we all have the same things to go through

Hold On, if you feel like letting go
Hold On, it gets better than you know

your days, you say they're way too long
and your nights, you can't sleep at all
Hold On
and you're not sure what you're waiting for
but you don't want to no more
you're not sure what you're waiting for
but you don't want to no more

But we all bleed the same way as you do
And we all have the same things to go through

Hold On, if you feel like letting go
Hold On, it gets better than you know

Don't stop looking, you're one step closer
Don't stop searching, it's not over

Hold On, if you feel like letting go
Hold On, it gets better than you know

Hold On~

-Hold On by Good Charlotte

=youaremyinspiration=

clubbing is onli fun w e rite company

2005-09-22T14:22:00.000+08:00

i'm looking horrible.

my super-sensitive skin is dry and dull from the lack of slp. and there are dark circles around my heavy eyebags. =(

got hm ard 6.30am this morn aft Roti Prata "breakfast" ard Middle Rd w shuai ger Gary, Pearlyn (I on u arh!!!), sweettarts Eileen, Cassandra, Nicole & Claudine, Daryl, Jin, Yong Han, as well as 2 or 3 other guys whose names I didn't catch.

e party at Cocolatte was SHIT. u hear me?? SHIT. e DJs were amateurs i guess, and they weren't rockin' e party at all! they were mostly practising their scratching & other DJ tactics. WTH. but, it's understandable, cos it's a wkday. they wldn't b playin SHIT songs on a weekend. yupp, e songs were like SHIT. i onli found about less than 10 songs familiar out of all e repititive SHIT tt was blasting. and e tempo was too slow, excessive scratching sooo disturbing, songs weren't GrOOvE-able... so much so tt i ended up dancin like i can't dance fer nuts. totali wasted my $14. we wld've left for some other club if i turned 18 alr (2 more mths!!)... sori guys!! -RAWRR-

however, absolutely no regrets, cos e company was great! there was this reali cute half-Jap guy in a yellow tee... Gary's fren... haha... his hair ish cool! like shaved with shapes ya noe wad i'm sayin'? haha... i was too shy to dance w him, plus e MUSIQ didn reali put me in e rite mood. DAMMIT. but i hv to admit, i enjoyed the after-party... e whole grp of us were walkin ard til' our feet hurt, esp e gals cos we were in strappy sandals & heels (mine were 2 inches high), and ended up walkin fr River Valley area all e wae to e Indian Coffeeshop at Middle Rd (a lil' further up Dhoby Ghaut). e gals were so tired n ate v little... i onli finished 1 out of e 2 prata kosongs which i ordered & gave e other one to Yong Han... e fish curry was gd though, but e teh-peng was jus some orange-coloured diluted liquid.

aniwaes, by e time we were done w b'fast, it was 6am & e midnight charge was over & i cldn't wait to get hm, bathe & fall aslp on my comfy bed, so i was e 1st one to hail a cab & leave reluctantly ... hey, i'm sure i'll get to party w 'em again sooon!!! Pearlyn, i on u arh!! heehee...

met Joyce & gang for pool at Paradigm & dinner b4 clubbing... aft which i went off to meet Don, whom I haven't met in 2-3 yrs, at Heeren & we made our wae to Cocolatte (which is quite out of e wae) by bus. so proud of myself, cos i didn take a cab. =) passed by e whole stretch of clubs & managed to see a few reputable/well-marketed clubs like Madam Wong's, Dbl O etc... and b4 leavin' town for Coco, Don actuali brought me into Rouge to take a look at e club... tts where i realized Acid Bar was situated in e heart of Orchard Rd, jus nx to Rouge. Acid Bar's a reali cool place to chill. I'm sooo gonna chiong like mad & check out e coooolest clubs & pubs durin' e hols aft I turn 18!!! =D

i shld've gone to Newsroom Bar on Tues... heard e party was gd... i actuali wanted to go to Club Momo tonite instead of Coco, but they're reali strict n check IDs. Coco didn't check most ppl. aniwaes, if I hadn't gone last nite, I wldn't hv met the wonderful ppl mentioned above. =)

i managed to try Rum-sprite, Lychee Martini (my fave drink apart fr Zouk's Peach Brandy), & some milk-based coffee-alcohol drink. nope, not Bailey's, it tastes much better than that. i hv yet to try Screw Driver, vodka dry-ice, Shirley Temple & Flaming Lumboguini (i hope i spelt that rite!)... as well as the very popular Tequila Shot... i've tried a few sips b4, but everytime somebody buys me a Shot, i dun dare to down it at one go like u r supposed to. i'm afraid it'll burn my throat & get me damn drunk. I shall succeed in my nx attempt!! i tink my alcohol tolerance is goin' up... is tt gd or bad?? hmmm...

and e best thing of all is, I stil hv enuf cash left to buy Shawn's bdae prezzie & dinner at Fish & Co. Glass House together w him & Sam on Sat nite to celebrate his bdae. whoohoo. my mum gave me an extra $50 to club & i managed to stretch my dollar. =)

i hv drawn a conclusion that clubbing is absolutely unhealthy. late nites, lack of slp, irregular slpin patterns, eyebags, dark circles, pimple breakouts, dry & dull skin, bloated-ness, wierd/irregular eating patterns & habits, loss of appetite.... and it is true, my Biology lessons in sec sch were very useful... e effects of alcohol on slowing down brain activity & body reactions r true... c'mon, we've all experienced it 1st hand, haven't we?? e onli thing I wil nv, ever do is to drink myself silly, onli to end up regurgitating my dinner. tt's jus sick. not a pretty sight for neither girl or boy, at all.

i reali kowtow to Gary. he hasn't been hm or slept in bout 2 days due to his unhealthy cycle of work-club-work-club-sleep-club.... seriously. can u imagine 3 consecutive days of clubbing when u hv to bloody work & hv no time to slp or go hm?? i'm glad to hear he's not goin to e party on Fri @ Indochine & Sat @ i-forgot-where... that'd hv made up 5 consecutive daes of clubbing!! wad a sin... how unhealthy! well, lucky for him, he doesn't get pimples. -jealous-

my body alwaes cocks up aft a sleepless nite. i jus postponed tuition with Maggy to tmr morn, much to e displeasure of her mother... constipated, bloated, tired & restless... and e wierd thing is, i'm drinking a chilled can of nescafe iced coffee, when i'm allergic to coffee (i get bad headaches from even just e smell of it), & nibbling on my precious purple packet of Cadbury's Black Forest chocolates... ppl, go try it! it's my essential whenever i travel on a plane overseas, including long, dreadful bus/car rides which make me sick. =)

to tell u a secret, if only i had a little more freedom, i'd b clubbing for nights on end jus like Gary, Pearlyn & e rest of e clubbers. =)

and then my blog wld be full of complaints about how unhealthy i'm feeling at the moment.

P.S. Dirty Dancing was uber-fun!!! ;)

the trouble with love is

2005-09-19T22:48:00.000+08:00

the trouble with love is.......

my heart bleeds for the broken hearted.

should i celebrate that i'm single & free of the pain that comes with a bitter-sweet commitment?

or is it a sin to envy the candy-sweet lovebirds that cross my path every dreadful day?

~i asked the sugarplum fairy~

micro miniskirt obsession

2005-09-19T16:18:00.000+08:00

the short weekend spent in Malacca felt like a whole week. the trip was pretty enjoyable, i have to admit. food was great. shopping was fun, though i only ended up with 2 pairs of sandals & a cute monkey t-short which i accidentally threw down the rubbish chute last nite in the midst of clearing my room to make space for my new sandals. WTF.

i almost bought a flowy beige bohemian skirt, a brown-laced white one, and a micro-mini denim skirt. it was so short it was rite up my bum, and kinda lian too. i loved it, but my cousin said it was too short & i didn hv e legs to carry it off. i was like.... whatever larhh. well, in any case, i think tt's soooo not true. not that i'm BHB, but i noe what i hv n wad i dun. great. so i ended up with no new clothes at all. P-A-T-H-E-T-I-C.

ok, i'm in a bitchy mood rite now. everythin's screwed up.

-my obsession with that Topshop denim mini skirt is affecting my senses. On top of that, i'm reali running outta clothes to wear, and i dun dare to ask Mummy for some shopping allowance cos she just spent about $4oo in total on my i-pod mini & charger.

-my gd fren&ex-classmate is leaving for Japan for good tonite and i cant stae out that late to send her off. we haven't met in months.

-i'm too lazy to start my supposed circuit training regime with Joel & i'm FAT.

-i'm too lazy to have extra tuition with Maggy so that i can claim my salary earlier in the month.

-i'm lost as to how to surprise Shawn on his birthday. (hope he doesn't read this)

-i'm hoping job-hunting with Jean tmr will be a success. I'm seriously broke & I neeed a job.

-I have yet to start studying for supp papers. Results will be out in approx. 5 days. God help me.

-I'm pondering over whether to go for the party @ Cocolatte on Wed... cos I'm broke & there's just so many more important things to do (if you've read the above).

-last but not least, i'm sick of my current template but am too lazy to change it.

i reali dunno what's happening to me. i'm losing touch with my frens, and i seem to have lost my passion for clubbing and late nights. what happened to my coffee-talk-chilling sessions, and my pre-planned girls-day-outings?? my current "hide-away" mode is probably due to my weight-gain, broke-ness & an onset of low self-esteem. perhaps i reali ought to go ahead with my jogging plans w Joel. perhaps some serious sweating might be able to lift my spirits.

I MISS JOYCE & MY BRO. I miss chilling out w 'em. I miss the incomplete lunches due to excessive bouts of laughter.

ok, i'm gonna try & convince as many peeps as i can to join me on the tracks tonite. i hope my enthusiasm will sustain.

indeed, the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak.

hiatus

2005-09-15T17:44:00.000+08:00

jus got hm fr tuition. tired, and very, very hungry.

Maggy is a little imp. She refuses to do my homework, and she's as stubborn as a donkey whenever i ask her to open her mouth to answer my qns. Grrr. i've reali stretched my patience for her. i've never been this patient w anyone. n i finally lost my patience todae, and gave her some stern remarks. Not like that helped. She'd better complete my hmwk by our nx lesson. -RAWWR-

hope i'll find a decent (no pun intended) super super short miniskirt fr Malacca, if i'm lucky enuf... i'm too broke this mth to get e uber-sexaye, $73 one fr Topshop.. so i'll jus hv to make do w an inferior substitute for nx Thursday's party at Club Momo (if I manage to get through e bouncers)... how pathetic. =(

i'll b on blogging hiatus fr tmr til' nx Mon... wil b back on Sundae though... i'm soooo not lookin forward to this DrEaDfuL trip. i miss home already!! WTH. one of the worst weekends of 2005.

oh, the horror!

obsession

2005-09-15T11:28:00.000+08:00

I m obsessed with:

-The Six Wives of Henry VIII by Alison Weir
-DIANA: The Last Word by Simone Simons
-Shanghai Baby by Wei Hui

-Imagine--- John Lennon
-Reflections of my Life--- Marmalade
-Candle In The Wind--- Elton John
-The Girl Is Mine--- Michael Jackson & Paul Mcartney
-You Are Not Alone--- MIchael Jackson
-Save The Best For Last--- Vanessa Williams
-Who's Holding Donna Now--- El Debarge
-Stars--- Simply Red

Go ahead, take a listen to the songs above (of course u'll have to download them 1st). They all manage to put me in the mood for some bitter-sweet lovin' & heartbreaks. =)

Nurul: heyz babe... i used to envy other babes n demean myself in a wae tt i wld go to slp feelin ugly, fat & pathetic... noe wad? jus b contented & give thanks tt u're not one of the homeless, clotheless & starving out there yea? nobody's perfect, & u may possess some things which others dun... work hard to achieve ur goals! c ya at class chalet.. peace x)

Hui Ting: Ting!! i love our girly chats & stuff... bitching & complaining whenever we get together.. haha.. i'm sure we'll meet up soon enuf for some coffee talk & serious shopping for super-short mini skirts!!! <3

Joyce: heyz babe.. though we jus met on Sat... but seems like we haven't talked in ages.. i reali miss u oh-so much!! we still haven't completed our Changi Village food hunt!! i dun care!! u tc yea? i'll alwaes b here if u need someone, n i'll alwaes b there 4 u no matter what, come what may.. ur my best, best-er, best-est Girlfriend!!! (Ivan, i noe ur my bro, but I'm sori, I dun like to share Joyce laRhh...) heh, jus kiddin man!! heehee... =D

I WANT A SUPER SUPER SHORT MINISKIRT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i'm supposed to b at Maggy's hse by 1pm. hu says giving tuition is an easy job (esp to young kids) shld b chopped into 18 slices of bloody red meat, half of the bulk to b thrown into the S'pore River, the other half to b cooked in Muthu's Curry.

hehe....

count your blessings

2005-09-14T13:41:00.000+08:00

my lappy cocked up last nite... it couldn close a certain programme n i gave up trying to shut it down and went to slp at 2am, after organising all the songs & playlists in my iTunes software. left it to hibernate all nite n the 1st thing i did when i woke up was to call Shawn n ask him to solve my lappy's prob. Thank God, the "control,alt,delete" buttons worked and the stupid proramme could finally be closed.

the songs on my iPod are finally done! *weeehoooweee* i'll b enjoyin what used to b a dreadful train/bus ride to orchard! gonna meet ma bro*Shawn for lunch. i'm addicted to Sakae Sushi!!! =)

i jus realised how fortunate i m. no matter how insatiable my needs/wants are, i have to admit, i m one of the blessed and more fortunate peeps ard. let's count my blessings one by one.

1. i have a laptop & an iPod (ridiculously expansive items that not everyone can afford)
2. i have a place to stay, nice clothes to wear & even some branded clothes & accessories
3. i have a loving and caring Grandma (my pillar of strength) & Mother.
4. not forgetting, i'm surrounded with understanding, fun & caring friends who make me laugh when i'm down and care enough about my existence =)

Though I have backslided from church & stuff, I m aware that God loves me no matter what... and if not for Him, I wouldn't be typing this post, giving thanks for all my blessings...

However, i m still vulnerable to the things of the world, and , of course, i still want so many many more things!!! =(

1. My Driving Licence!!! (and a car?!?!)
2. A small, cosy studio apartment (courtesy of the Mother)
3. Panasonic Lumix Digital Camera
4. 60 GB External Hard Disk
5. Glossy Black Birkenstocks (i'm a size 38, anyone??)

you see. well, at least i try notto b so materialistic & spoilt. and the babes hv reassured me that i'm jus another normal teenage girl caught up with the desires of this world.

ok, i'd better get down to changin... it's past lunch!! Shawn's gonna kill me!!

exhausted

2005-09-13T20:00:00.000+08:00

came hm ard 5pm todae. im exhausted fr unpacking my bag, and then having had to pack my cupboard all over again. Grrr. finally finally i can settle down n blog. i've missed my sexy black keyboard sooo much. -sigh-

i'm sad that we had to check out todae. i miss my mum. i'm tired. and confused. m i falling for someone new? i dunno. i'm almost over HIM, but the emotions get the better of me. at this pt in time, mayb i'm startin to fall for someone else. but he's out of reach. two totali diff worlds. i shall force myself to move on, and i wil, eventually.

for the better part of the dae, Mummy bought me the i-pod mini in pink. weehooweee. it's meant to b my bdae-cum-xmas prezzie. bleaghs. looks like i mite not b havin a Mac's bdae party aft all. i'll hv to fork out e whole cost on my own. unless, of course, the mother would be so sweet and sympathetic as to celebrate my 18th bdae for me. i'm actuali savin up for my licence too!! that explains my money woes n e reason y i'm desperately lookin for a nice job. prob is, i'm too fussy. i dun wanna work in the F&B line, nor the Sales line. they're jus draining, tiring & utterly horrible, as far as my experiences tell me. but then again, those two genres are about all that i'll b hired for, based on my age & experience rite? not forgettin, of course, tuition, but the money i'm paid is simply pathetic.

wil be in Malacca fr Fri til Sun... sigh looks like ill b missing my laptop again. sigh.

heard bout e party @ momo nx Thurs... hope i can make it...

that's it. totali in no mood to blog. Shawn's on e line. ta-ta.

bimbo

2005-09-10T21:06:00.000+08:00

Mummy got me Anna Sui Love perfume with a free charmbracelet and a pink Guess? watch to match my pink Guess? handbag. for wad reasons? no idea. she jus bought those for fun... or rather, she said i've been studyin v hard, hence the gifts. haha. WTH.

truth is, I haven't been studyin AT ALL... read my previous posts n u get wad i mean. gonna take supp papers larhh... haha.. the reason why my mum thinks i've been studyin is cos i went thru' a few pages of notes in front of her. wad to do. the hotel rm so small. wahaha.

hmmm i need a job. my tuition assignments are pathetic. i-pod mini. I WANT. *squatsdownandcries*

mugging nx week. i must i must i must. -DISCIPLINE-

DEAD LaRhh

2005-09-09T11:38:00.000+08:00

jus completed CMSY examintaion paper. only one word. -SCREWED-

if God would sympathize with me, he'd let me pass Econs & Accs. currently, the confirmed supp papers are IISO & CMSY.

i can sae gd-bye to the hols. well, at least during September. Thank God my b'dae falls in November, when Sem 2 wld've jus started n no tests or exams SHIT wadsoever. told Mummy bout havin to take supp papers. she said "just pray & do ur best." Yes!! God still loves me, for my mum didn scream & threaten to cut my allowance.

at this pt in time, i hv made up my mind to start mugging real hard for IISO & CMSY ( for real this time, i SWEAR) once this weekend is up. and, just in case, Econs is on my study list as well. i CANNOT afford to repeat any modules. i'll either commit suicide, or bcum a depressed gothic-whore. ok, no link.

my greatest REGRET about having to take supp papers is that i'd hv wasted my sweet, precious time (to b exact, more than half of the hols)... i'd wanted to find a job. and earn like a few hundred at least, by the end of the month. i hv a long, eager list of stuff that NEEDS to b purchased. guess i'll hv to suffer from broke-ness again this mth n perhaps things will get better in October, & i'd b able to earn ENOUGH cash to suffice my desires.

i dun reali hv the mood & "form" to play pool w d Gang ltr on. but i jus cant resist the game. WTH. shoot me, somebody??

=HE is not ALL mine, not even MINE, and will NEVER be MINE=

mug & chocolate

2005-09-08T17:56:00.000+08:00

ahh... finally got my hands on a keyboard - Pacific Coffee Club at Changi Airport. wahaha. not havin any internet access for more than 3 daes sux. i feel so deprived. the irony is, i'll b sad to check out n go home on Mon, but i miss home at the same time. Grrr.

let's see. i screwed IISO, Accs & Econs so far. erm. i'm gonna screw CMSY tmr. im at the airport noe tryin hard to mug... looks like its not workin. WTH. i'm damn scared ill end up havin to take 4 sup papers la... my Mum's gonna seriously chop my head off... or worse, cut my allowance!! *screams*

okok i shall quit surfing n get back to the notes. Timothy's bloody rushing me. ok la, i noe he means well. o wells. i'm jealous tt Ivan has completed his exams alr. Grrr. the keyboard here sux so i shall end here.

All the best for CMSY ppl!!!! Last (dreadful) Paper!!! *weeehoooweeee

exams screwed

2005-09-06T15:50:00.000+08:00

Accounts paper sucked. screwed. i'm dead. this is gonna b one f***in' long entry.

the paper consisted of 15 MCQ qns and 4 long qns. 3 of which meant a breeze to me. the MCQ was chicken as well. but SHIT happens. yes, i truly belive i've been too complacent about A/Cs.

i was happily scribbling my answers and light-heartedly making my way thru the qns, which were relatively easy, when suddenly, at 11.20 am, 1 hr 50 mins after the commencement of the paper, the bloody teacher picked up the mike, and i heard death ringing in my ears, : "IT IS NOW 11.20 am. YOU HAVE 10 MINUTES LEFT."

WHAT. THE. FUCK.

i bloody thot the paper was 3 hrs, just like the IISO paper yesterdae. at that point in time, i had only just started the 2nd last qn, which was worth 20 marks. To make things worse, the last qn was my forte. Balance Day Adjustments. the easiest to score, and the heaviest-weightage qn of an Accounts Exam Paper. and it was worth 28 marks. i felt my heart was being corroded by acid or sth. i'd only completed approx. 50 out of 100 marks worth of the paper, hence my last resort was to complete the General Journal of the last qn with the last 10 mins i had, cos thats the sure-thing that can score me a few more marks to just scrape the border and pass the paper. i mean, out of the 50-plus marks worth of qns that i completed, some marks wld definitely b deducted due to mistakes, so i had to try and score a few more marks here and there.

my greatest fear now is failing the A/Cs paper. not bcos i didn study, but bcos i mistook the duration of the exam paper. the pain is twice as hurtful, bcos i noe, i would have scored an A, had i finished the paper in time. i mean, not that i'm being complacent, but c'mon, i got an A for course grade, and i scored 41.5/50 for the 1st accounts test, and 42/45 for the 2nd, this sem. now do you understand me when i sae SHIT happens??? RAWWWRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i just hope my course grade can pull my marks up n then ill probably stand a chance of gettin a B or C at least for the overall course grade of all my subjects. and it'll be a miracle if i pass IISO. i'm supposed to b mugging for the dreaded MacroEcons paper tmr. now, i'm aware tt the duration of tmr's paper is 2 hrs. no more big, stupid mistakes man.

i gtg pack my bag for the whole week ahead soon. goin' to the Changi Village Hotel (the re-vamped Changi Meridien Hotel) to stay with my mum and grandma until nx Monday. Dun ask why. basically, my mum is a f***in' spoilt, rich tai-tai whose husband has gone on a business trip overseas and will most probably be back on Monday evening. and she doesn like to stay in the house alone, hence the hotel stay. for those of you hu think its cool, and oh-so-very-fun, trust me, it's not. the hotel is new and very clean and cosy, but i cant access to the internet, unless i pay like $150 for a 24hr continuous connection or sth. ridiculous rite? exactly. n the hotel's located near the famous Changi Village hawker centre (that's rite, the Nasi Lemak haunt), and there's no MacDonald's nearby, so i cant use the internet at all. RAWWRR. i wan MSN!!! *screamsss* another reason why i dun find it fun is bcos i have to bloody pack my clothes and personal stuff to bring there and unpack the whole bulk when i get hm. RAWWRR. i told u its not fun rite?? mayb if my mum booked our regular Raffles the Plaza ( the former Westin Stamford Hotel), i'd b much more willing to go on this pathetic "getaway" thingy. what's more, there are MacDonalds' located all over town, and i can easily walk to the nearest Macs and back just to use the free internet. GRRRR.

and now, i'm gonna complain about my pimples, eyebags and bad hair days.

i need to start:

1) moisturising every night. (all hail Nivea's body moisturising lotion)
2) doing face & eye mask weekly. (Body Shop's Tea-tree Oil facial scrub, mask, nose pore mask & Camomile eye mask)
3) doing a footscrub weekly. ( Body Shop's Peppermint Footscrub and LemonGrass foot lotion)
4) waxing my limbs. i'm hairy, but that doesn't mean i'm horny. Lalalalaala. (Veet's wax-strips)
5) applying sunblock on my face everyday without fail. UV rays are harmful. (Avene face sunblock-moisturiser)

i need to purchase the products in green. i'm broke. i definitely wun b enjoyin the hols. supp papers, and hopefully, a nice part-time job that can earn me sufficient $$$ to fulfil my manymany needs and wants.

And don't you dare call me a high-maintenance spoilt brat. cos i'm not. i'm just a normal, troubled, broke teenage girl. know why i'm broke just a week after gettin my $*00 monthly allowance? cos $190 went to my phone bill. just shoot me larhh.

time to go pack. i'll miss my lappy, and MSN. =(

thank you mr. bboy

2005-09-04T12:55:00.000+08:00

aft tuitioning Maggy ystdae, i went down to city hall to meet Ivan. i'd had a pathetic curry puff for b'fast, i was hungry, n i was craving for good ol' Laksa. (must be exam stress. within the past week i've degenerated into a lazy, fat, greedy pig. shoot me.)

and so da brudder&sista pair made their wae thru' the rain (literally) from city hall to katong. the authentic Katong Laksa #51. he ordered his bowl w/o clams, n i ordered mine with clams. when the laksa came, we ended up takin e wrong bowls and he had to pass me the clams one by one. wads wrong with clams man?? u're missing out!

o. did i mention i had a plate of rojak all by myself b4 the laksa came?? i was too hungry. hur hur. i dun tink ill b wearin my jeans anytime soon. circuit trainin nx week i sweeaaarr!!!

met joyce at the airport to mug in the evening. by the time we settled down, it was alr 7.30pm. u c lah. u c lah. nx time mugging period cannot call ivan. he is a source of distraction. keeps crackin lame jokes and makin me laugh til my sides ache. its not funny!! i onli covered the 1st lecture of IISO so far ok!!!!

Mummy picked me up fr e airport aft she finished dinner with my grandma. was hinting to her bout havin to take supplementary papers. she just told me to do my best. but i noe she'll kill me larhh. and my MacDonald's birthday party depends on my results. WTH. -sobs-

its time to throw myself into IISO. no time alr. i'm reali freaked out. approx. 20 hrs to the paper. there's time to study enuf to just get a D grade, provided i dun slp.

cant study

2005-09-02T17:22:00.000+08:00

hey Mr. Bboy:

i'm reali sori it's been a rollercoaster of emotions for you
ever since day 1 of your commitment to a pretty face
it hurts to see you cry
and get your heart broken incessantly
in search of a non-existant togetherness
its not your fault
neither is it hers
you know its not right
but no one ever told you that its wrong
and you can't let go
with every step you take
you're falling deeper
completely drawn in and blind to your surroundings
i've been standing right here by your side all along
it doesn't matter if you've never seen my foot prints
i know i'll never be existant in your world
i'm sorry i can't catch your fall
or dry your tears when you cry
i can't put that sparkle in your eyes
or turn your reality into a dream
i'm sorry i can't save you
i'm sorry i can't let go
though there was never anything to grasp at all
but i'm stil here
still holding on
still hoping, still praying
i'm not even asking for a chance
just let me hold on to what was never there~

i'm a bitch, i admit

2005-09-02T12:14:00.000+08:00

Pasta Fresca's hawaiian pizza & Tiramisu cake RAWKS.

Thanks for the delivery last nite, Mummy!! DeLiCiOuS!!

hmmm... pizza & tiramisu for breakfast. wad a sin.

sarah khor is a bitch. yes, i've broken my own =BLOGGING HIATUS= once again. bad-tempered, in-your-face, sympathetic, sensitive BITCH.

-cocoa cream-lipstick on my lips-

broken promises to myself

2005-09-01T18:54:00.000+08:00

1st, i promised myself i wldn touch my laptop at all, let alone take it out from its case, until exams r over nx Fri.

then, i promised myself i wld't buy any junk food to munch on whilst mugging.

i've broken 2 promises todae: here i am blogging, and on my wae hm fr tuition, i purchased a kit kat pack of 7, cadbury fruit & nut chocolate, cadbury twirl chocolate, kinder bueno and a tin of hot & spicy chips. i'm not gd at keeping promises, i admit. -RAWRR-

okok, i promise this'll b the last post til nx Fri... those of u hu r about to comment, "yea, right"... SHUT UP.

todae is a dae worth remembering.

after tuitioning Maggy, i was about to leave when her mother told me to wait a minute... and then, sweet sweet surprise... Maggy presented meee with a 3-stalk bouquet of fresh BLOOD RED ROSES. mmmm. MY FAVOURITE. how sweet. how touching!! -sobs-

that little imp of a girl actuali made my dae!! she's naughty, and slow to learn, but she's the sweetest thing ever. i gave her a warm big hug.. her tiny shoulders fit snugly into my embrace...

when was the last time i received a bouquet of flowers (i only lust after roses)?? let's see.. 14th February 2002. from my ex, Jeremy Tay Kok Ee. I loved him. loved. ahem.

of course, there after, i hv received single beautiful stalks of roses here n there... i gave this guy i reali liked a blue rose. n he was touched. but he proved to b a jerk in the end. shit happens.

todae is a dae worth remebering... not solely bcos i received a bouquet of fresh BLOOD RED ROSES, but bcos someone said something that jerked my heart strings and made me want to cry.

"Happy Teacher's Day"

such mellifluous words flowing out of the cherry-lips of a tender-hearted child.

Thank You, Maggy.

being a teacher really brings about a sense of satisfaction in your heart when you gain the love, trust and respect from your student(s). I'm starting to love teaching. that said, i'm considering NIE after i get my Degree with Honours.

I LOVE CHILDREN.

but no monkeys, please!

addiction

2005-09-01T12:23:00.000+08:00

there are times where one has to quit complaining about the adversities of life, and spare a little moment to count all the unseen blessings we have been granted, which we have overlooked as a result of our stubborn ignorance.

hence, i'd like to say, with all the extreme clubbing and havoc partying sessions i've indulged in life, i really thank God for watching over me and keeping me safe and sound. evidence lies in a few circumstances which make me what i am today:

1. despite countless bfs, i'm still intact. (if u noe wad i mean)

2. i've never been raped.
(for the benefit of the oblivious ppl living in their own perfect lil' world, there are countless unreported cases of teens being raped by their bfs or any other guy in their defenseless state of drunken stupor. most victims choose not to report their cases in order to save face and hide their shame. foolish act, yes, but reporting a rape case, especially, involves a lot of unassociated characters and can blow up and ruin your whole life and reputation.) Trust Me. My friend was raped. and she reported it initially, but when the son-of-a-bitch policemen started making things difficult and complicating the whole matter, and pulling all sorts of unassociated people in for statements and stuff, she withdrew the report. that DAMN AFRICAN guy got awae scot-free.)
Lesson Learnt: Never EVER leave ur drinks unattended. Watch over them like a hawk.

3. i've never tried drugs, let alone seen a real-life sample. DRUGS ARE EVIL. (ok fine i used to fag, but it's been a looong time since i've lit up. i HATE the smell now.)
my past "friends" used to indulge drugs like ecstacy, K, ,55, and despite having free access to a pill or two, no way man. i'm too afraid to lose control of my mind and body.

hell yea, i've never even gone COMPLETELY drunk from alcohol. VERY HIGH, yes. INSANE, yes. but never totally GONE. that explains blessings no. 1 & 2. =)

however, i AM addicted to something rather serious. MY LAPTOP. -DIE-

it's not funny. im serious. i get withdrawal symtoms if i dun switch it on n use it the minute i get hm, or the minute i get up from bed. it's a HUGE source of distraction from my books. i hate this. i need to exercise self-control (which i completely lack). now i noe y my dad used to moniter my computer usage. despite the fact he's a bastard, i now see the logic behind his ridiculous act.

i reckon it's time for a blogging hiatus. until exams r over, that is, which wld be nx Friday. i am going to ask my grandma to lock up my latop in her cupboard rite after this post. -sobs-

sigh. tuition at 2pm with Maggy. well, at least i hv an adorable student. i'm just plain lazy!!

let's see how long i can abstain from my sexy black keyboard.
until then ppl.

~I MISS YOU BADLY~

i miss you

2005-08-31T15:19:00.000+08:00

coffee talk and stoning sessions
chocolate mints wrapped in sweet pink paper
surprise e-mails and goodbye hugs
colourful banter in the name of love

SHAWN GOH WENDE: you.don't.call.me.anymore.

muahaha. i'm jus kiddin'. this crucial mugging period explains the deafening silence from you. after exams i wan to start bullying you again. again, again!! i miss gossiping w my Bro* larhh!!!

i'm getting worried bout the exams. i can smell the ink on the exam papers already.

-back to mugging-

something new

2005-08-30T18:41:00.000+08:00

i made a new discovery about myself today.

i love breakfast:

-home-made butter toast
-self-cooked fried eggs & sausages
-pancakes smeared w maple syrup & butter
-home-made iced-milo gao gao

*addicted~i cld live on the above every single day. =)

i enjoy cooking for my loved ones. but i suck at baking. the only cakes i've ever succeeded making are Betty-Crocker's brownie-mix brownies, American Cheesecake and Refrigerated lemon-chessecake. yummy.

*Sarah: "My future husband will b so blessed. i can cook, clean & wash. i do my own laundry. i handwash almost all my clothes, bcos i'm washing machine-phobic. Washing machines screw up ur clothes. they stretch and crinkle them, and sometimes mix all the colours up. I can sweep & mop too, and I love to cook, and the food usually turns out good."

Shawn: "You sound like you're advertising your services as a maid."

The above convo was bout a few weeks back. Thanks ah, Bro. Instead of getting praised, I got backfired. *wooosh

For those of u who feel a growing sense of doom & hopelessness in ur heart bcos u hv not touched a friggin' page of ur notes in preparation for the impending exams due nx week, join my club. *waves*

Sweetie*Joycie just shared her study timetable w me. Hope i'll b disciplined enuff to stick religiously to it. We will pass the exams together honey!!! *weeehoooweee

I resolute to:
1. start mugging and stick to my new study timetable, courtesy of Joyce.
2. resume a healthy lifestyle of healthy eating and regular exercise. Circuit training and low-carbo/low-fat products shall be first on my Love-List.
3. be a better person. no more demands of a high-maintenance lifestyle or rebelling against home rules. no more bitching about ppl no matter how mean/pesky they are to me.
4. bring my phone bill value down to $70 a mth. The latest amount I incurred was $190.
5. forget HIM and be happy. at least try. =X

I'm in a reali lazy mood. i dun wanna move. i'm too lazy to even pee and take a bath b4 dinner.
hopelessly piggy, i noe.

screw you

2005-08-29T09:11:00.000+08:00

The following words are adapted from a certain someone's blog:

"Hmm. Honestly, i did something today BUT some ppl just dun seem to appreciate it. Bleargh.It really doesnt pay to change huh. The old me wouldnt have bothered to apologise. And i`m not the sorta person who leaves the mess i`ve created. i clean up after myself eventually. Well, all i can say is, i`ve done my part. if that person`s not gonna accept my apology, THEN SO BE IT (: i know i can say a whole load of things to defend myself, but no, i didnt. too bad lar. not my loss. neither is it her loss. it`s fair. and square (: "

Well, for those readin this entry, and to the person responsible for the above post, I would like to sae a few words.

1. Did YOU just use the word "change"? O.M.G. u obviously hv no sense of judgement upon urself. If u hv reali CHANGED, i dun think u wld hv had the instinct to use vulgarities on me indirectly just because i refused YOUR offer to be "friends". YOU shld b glad i'm keepin it cool w YOU at e moment because of certain consequences. O, wait, i dun think YOU've ever heard of the word "consequences". Tsk tsk. My Condolences. =)

2. YOU think i'm stupid? Dumb? a Pushover? well, honey, i'm sorry. i guess i'm more Alert than u actuali think i m. wad exactly are YOU tryin to pull? Firstly, YOU go round playing guys & getting a SiCkEnInG sense of satisfaction by breaking their hearts. Secondly, YOU think YOU own the world n are free to do anything and everything YOU like to others, but others aren't allowed to ScReW YOU at all. Hail the Almighty-YOU.

3. Yes, YOU may hv apologized and TrIeD to clean up the shit YOU left behind. But reali, Did YOU hv to create a BiGGeR Pile.Of.Shit. by using vulgarities on me behind my back? If YOU're that thick-skinned, Dun do it in e dark la. It makes me realize the P-A-T-H-E-T-I-C inscribed on ur forehead. Just bring it on and Say.It.To.My.Face.

4. Whether I accept YOUR apology or not, does it really matter to YOU?? In the 1st place, why wld YOU wanna humiliate meee and piss me off, when i hv done nth wrong to YOU at all?? Let me explain to YOU why i'm being such a FUCKTARD. (oooh, sounds familiar?? YOUR trademark word.) Firstly, YOU humiliated meee. (To add oil to the fire, in front of HIM.) Secondly, YOU apologized, I about accepted it in my heart n I sincerely, genuinely thought we cld give this "friendship" another chance, but YOU had to screw it all up using vulgarites on me, behind my back. To top it all off, YOU left a sickening post on ur blog aiming at me indirectly. YOU are one amazing, beautiful woman. Well Done. *clapclap*

5. WHY? YOU're feeling insecure? Puh-Leease. YOU reali insult meee. I am not a f***in' BF snatcher/heartbreaker/BITCH/FUCKTARD. Why shld YOU feel threatened just bcos i USED to like YOUR sweetheart?? Like, hv I ever made a single move ever since you 2 hv been blissfully back "2gether" again?? NOOOO. All I did was wish YOU both the best, and YOU took my kindness for granted and made a fool outta meee. Which I absolutely cannot tolerate. And YOU did it TWICE. Tsk Tsk.

6. My Conclusion is, YOU didn't succeed in cleaning up YOUR shit, but instead hv made things worse. I'm reali sori things hv turned into such a twisted mess. I pity those caught in btw this sickening issue. WHAT THE FUCK HV I EVER DONE TO YOU TO DESERVE ALL THIS?? Dun get me wrong, I'm not scared of YOU. I'm just fed up & appalled. And I'm keepin it cool n being discreet about it bcos we're stuck in e same LT for 3 whole yrs, n e possibility of us ending up in e same class some dae is very, very high. So, let's jus stop feuding n smile whenever we see each other, shall we? To avoid any UGLY circumstances at all. Be it FRIENDS or ACQUAINTANCES, YOU can be rest assured I WILL NOT screw things up for YOU or give YOU a FUCKTARD's ATTITUDE. Okie?? For the sake of our faces, and the fact that we're more or less stuck w each other for the nx 2-over yrs, I'll let all this shit go n jus smile whenever I see YOU, and things r gonna b e same as b4. Unless of course, YOU try anything funny w me again. Then dun blame me. *shakes hand* I hope YOU took my hand. =)

To everyone who has just read this post, sorry for the vulgarities. I'm reali sorry if i appear to b such a bitch, but u guys noe its purely unintentional. if NOTHING rocked my boat, I wldn b here letting all this shit out. For those of you hu noe e whole truth, pls forgive this poor friend of yours. *sobs* I'm still the same happy-go-lucky, sentimental, humble, fierce, loud and totally insane Sarak Khor. Thank You for your kind understanding and loving support.

Btw, Ivan's bdae bbq went great! A few of us got insanely drunk, so u can imagine e chaos. haha. damn fun la! I lurb my Joyce & Ivan kor-kor beri beri much!!! & bah-chor-mee supper at 4am w Tim was cool... tt totali sobered me up fr e vodka... thank God i dun hv a hangover... faithful prayers alwaes work. my mum's pickin me up at 12pm for lunch n a movie.. sianz.. i'm damn stoned fr e lack of slp. bleaghs.

Happy Bdae BRO!!! *weeehoooweee

-I Love All My Friends.-

chalet later

2005-08-28T13:34:00.000+08:00

beautiful Sunday aftnoon.

i'm so disorganised. so screwed.
1. i have not studied at all.
2. i have not packed anythin for e stayover at ivan's chalet tonite.

evidently, my laziness is a bane to my existence. Grrr. RAH RAH RAH!!!

*Dear God, pls pls pls let me pass the exams... even if i get a D, i jus wanna pass every subject n move on to Sem 2 in peace... without having to repeat any subject at all... Thank You. Amen.*

Meetin John at 4plus at SengKang int.change to go to e chalet together... tt bugger doesn noe how to get to downtown east... Welcome to Singapore John!!! *haha

i jus realized i'm gonna miss hm tonite. though my place is just a-straight-bus-across-the-expressway awae fr downtown east. this will be my 1st stayover this yr. erm, well, if u dun count e times when i was stranded aft bein chased out of my dad's hse, in transition to new-found freedom. (i think it's my phobia of being homeless that's caused me to loathe stayin' out.)and, of course, when i was out all nite partyin awae at coco latte. whoo. tt reminds me. i'll get to dance like there's no tmr again tonite!! i luuurve dancing!! *weeehoooweee (albeit the fact that i can NEVER get the steps rite in a proper DANCE STUDIO... must b the nervousness.)

vodka mix. blasting R&B Hip-Hop. Beer. A CooL Crowd... and a SeXy gRooVe.

torn

2005-08-27T18:24:00.000+08:00

Torn - Natalie Imbruglia

i thought i saw a man brought to life
he was warm
he came around like he was dignified
he showed me what it was to cry

but you couldn't be that man that i adore
you don't seem to know
seem to care what your heart is for

i don't know him anymore
there's nothing well
he used to lie
the conversation has run dry
that's what's goin' on
nothing's fine i'm torn

i'm a lot of faith
this is how i feel
i'm cold and i'm ashamed
lying naked on the floor
illusion never changed
into something reali
i'm wide awake and i can see
the perfect sky is torn
you're a little late
i'm already torn

so i guess the fortune teller's right
i should've seen just what was there
and not some holy light
to crawl beneath my veins and now
i don't care
i have no luck
i don't miss it all that much
there's just so many things
that i can't touch i'm torn

i'm a lot of faith
this is how i feel
i'm cold and i'm ashamed
lying naked on the floor
illusion never changed
into something real
i'm wide awake and i can see
the perfect sky is torn

i'm a lot of faith
this is how i feel
i'm cold and i'm ashamed
bound and broken on the floor
you're a little late
i'm already torn

you're gonna geddit fr me

2005-08-27T11:31:00.000+08:00

hello there Miss Smarty Pants. how nice of u to make a fool outta me, n laugh at e expense of my painful heartbreak. very well. we shall c hu gets e last laugh. u watch out. one more time u mess things up or leave any shit behind, i'm gonna snap, and YOU"RE GONNA GET IT FROM ME.

seriously. laugh all u wan. jus dun tread on my toes or flash me ur plastiq smile again. i'll jus flash u my wooden smile fr now on. i trusted u. u betrayed my trust. NEVER EVER HUMILIATE SARAH KHOR XIUYI. SHE DOES NOT LIKE TO BE HUMILIATED AT ALL.

for those of u hu wanna give this dangerous take a try, go ahead. jus dun end up hatin me.

TO ALL MY WUNDERFUL FRIENDS OUT THERE: I'm reali sori if i ever snap or go crazy in front of u guys, or to anyone i dislike at all. there is a limit to everything. and not like i hv a slow,cool-temper. pls forgive me. ilu guys. thanks for bein there for me all e time. *hugs -i promise to let this incident go. just this once. the nx time, i dunnno wad i'll do. =D

its a warm, sunny Sat morn. gtg off to tuition Maggy now. Hope she's done my hw.

rite....

2005-08-26T17:18:00.000+08:00

ok. im f***in pissed/embarrassed/speechless/irrational now. rite now. i jus found out i've been busted. is tt e word? but anywae, ive been played out by some pretty smart ppl. wth. i'm soooo not happy. gonna meet joyce n tell her all bout it nownownow. they're all playin pool. n i dun tink ill b joinin em. no mood todae. grrrr. i jus pray i wun snap.

i'm reali not sure...

2005-08-26T16:39:00.000+08:00

boring Friday aftnoon. ponned sch.. 1 hr of CommSkills & 2 hrs of lecture.. wth. waste of time.

cant wait for Sunday~ma bro Ivan's bdae bbq!!~ weeeehoooweee*

shld i meet Joel ltr to buy Ivan's prezzie?? lazy laRhh...

i'm so confused. dunno whether to believe some stuff i've jus been told. =(

i haven started muggin! sigh.. i dun wanna fail my exams but im so lazy!! got a 'C' for CommSkills. contented. cos i didn study. at least i passed... CommSkills is SHIT. i'm startin to dread it. Grrr. thank God e sem is over... lookin forward to better daez ahead nx sem!

with every word you say
you take my heart away
good or bad
right or wrong
it doesn't matter to me
as long as you're happy
your smile spreads itself across my face
your pain causes my heart to break
you will never realize how much you mean to me
you will never know how much it hurts to see
your pride being smashed
and your heart being torn into pieces
i was there to catch your tears
blinded by ignorant bliss
you bring the storm into my mundane world
i wish you'd exit silently
but i can't help but look out for your footsteps
which is why i'm torn
broken and lost
heartache after heartache
it started with a foolish chase
and turned into a twisted mess
i don't want to see you
yet i wish you were there
i have no choice
no safe escape
i just let love twirl me around its coarse fingers
i'm at the mercy of your smile

cravings~

2005-08-25T13:29:00.000+08:00

strawberry-flavoured hello panda craving satisfied. ~mmmm

rushin thru CommSkills executive summary now... hate this shit. gotta rush off to give tution soon. i'm late!! supposed to b there by 2pm. hack it. i'm a YOUNG and WILFUL teacher. =P

i miss my mum. not her E200. not her $$. not jus cos she pampers me. I jus plain Miss her.

so SHE found out. now SHE noes. but she's being reali sweet about it. she still loves me as a babe i hope. haha. i'm lettin' go la... babe, u noe hu u r. *wink* hint:sheloveslimegreen

stop procrastinatin SARAH!!! onli 11 days to exams!! start muggin' nownownow!!!

*to all e couples out there: take it easy. dun fret when things go wrong. jus relax, b urself, b strong&faithful, and you'll make it thru e rain. things r gonna b ay-okaye.
hinthintMr&MrsIvanTay-

Mummy!! I love u, but, I reali need moremoremore MONEY!! =D
pls dun find out tt it all goes to my fone bill... yes, my hp deprives me of wealth. =(

i found out

2005-08-24T11:26:00.000+08:00

so i found out wad i was dying to noe last nite. in actual fact, i reali didn wanna hear it. but i was dying. jus dying to noe.

that lead to my painful decision to jus leave things as they are. n let go. a clean, strong cut. quote Hui Ting, "what's meant to be yours, wil be"... mayb i shld stop bein stubborn. but its not by choice tt i get my heart into a mess n then cry bout it ltr on. when u fall for someone, u jus fall. regardless of ANY-DAMN-THING. as e sayin goes, Love is blind. pure evidence rite under my nose. how not to admit??

its like i wan it [him], but i KNOW i CAN'T have it [him]. complicated. girls, u noe wad im tokin bout.

That aside, im so glad my life is filled w precious, sweet babes!! Eunice, Joyce, Belinda, Hui Ting, Audrey, Fit... u guys nv fail to put a smile on my face... ILU-all of youuuu!!! *mua

take me back to that place
now, what's it called?
where the stars glow
and the darkness doesn't bite
where my heart can fly
and my soul cannot break
in a moment of folly
i chased away the memories
i think i remember the name
that haven is called yesterday

Y?? Y?? Y??

2005-08-23T13:01:00.000+08:00

stayin w my mum these few daes... no mood to hv fun n crap ard w her. cos... cos... i'm heartbroken.

WHY?? WHY?? WHY??

Why cant i get over him
Why does he seem to be ignorin me
Why are things the way they are
Why does SHIT happen
Why must i get so flustered n depressed over HIM??!!

this is soooo UNFAIR. I cant stop myself fr broodin over HIM.

cant cry cant eat cant slp. -GrrRR- my heart reali, REALI HURTS. i resolute to let go. once and for all. i dun hv a choice. i hate my emotions. i'm almost numb.

no time to blog larH~

2005-08-22T12:43:00.000+08:00

I have not played pool in a wk. no form no time no money. muahaha.

Perfect dinner on Fri at The Beaufort Hotel in Sentosa... e chicken rice is SuPeR!!

Went to Mark's hse on Sat... Joyce Ivan Eunice John Belinda me n Mark... Crappin' e whole time... lazin ard... Fantabulous Pizza dinner & mini disco session in his rm... sleek, sexy moves.. haha... yea Mark can break quite well... Belinda's dirty dance is damn seductive LarH!!

Bought a formal A-line skirt fr Little Match Girl & G2000 lavender blouse... I dun like e skirt. wld look so much nicer if it were shorter. i dun care. i'm gonna alter it aft IISO presentation on Tues.

stressedstressedstressed. I can c the exam papers alr. -DEAD_-

Dear God, pls bless my IISO project!!

~i'm lost in you. Yes, you.~

new layout

2005-08-16T17:40:00.000+08:00

done. i like it. i noe u like it too. =)

busybusybusy...and stressed!!

2005-08-15T21:45:00.000+08:00

20 days to exams. and counting. 24 hrs a day reali insufficient for me. assignmentsassignments. projectsprojects. presentationspresentations. EXAMS. EXAMS.

Dear God, pls give me the strength and discipline to br efficient in my studies, and bless me with the ability to retain all knowledge necessary for the exams so that i may do well. Amen.

i'm totali stressed out. gonna b burnt out soon. 20 days.

the grass looks greener...

2005-08-12T23:23:00.000+08:00

i cant believe it!! this morn i realized i lost my FCUK black 3/4 sleeve cardigan which my mum handed down to me!! omg. its like suuper comfy n beautiful.. sigh. was so bothered by it e whole dae.. i actuali thot it was a Narciso Rodriguez, made-in-Italy, $200+ piece, but on e wae hm i thought mighty hard n realized it's fr FCUK... so e heartache's gone... at least it's not some super-branded piece... i'm so relieved it's only fr FCUK!! it'd only cost $100 at most i guess...

ok. my shoppin list is damn long; phone bill damn high. i shall work hard durin e hols n splurge. Grrr. Money is so damn liquid. One can never get enuf of it.

CMSY project cleared for e time-being. Presentation in 2 wks, however. Econs, IISO projects due soon too. CommSkills test nx Fri. Exams in 24 days. n i hv not studied at all. -RAWWRR-

how i wish i cld buy time.

stresstresstress

2005-08-11T20:54:00.000+08:00

stressedupfedupf***edup. rushin CMSY project. deadline tmr. Econs report due on Tues. hv yet to do up CommSkills questionnare. hv to stae back aft sch on Mon to construct IISO model. need to prepare for terrifyin CommSkills test nx Fri. Exams in 25 days. -SCREAMS-

badly in need of a part-time job. phone bill arrivin in 5 days. manymany Leo bdays comin' up. totally, pathetically broke.

dreadfully countin down. exams in 25 days... but freedom in approx. 35 days!!

~when the moon is full, put on ur dancin' shoes.

busy busy busy

2005-08-10T17:02:00.000+08:00

"The Maid" is a must-watch. rather impressive for a locally-produced movie show... great sound effects, good story-line... it's scary enuf to spook e hell outta u... i promise that it's worth every cent. c'mon, a grp of american boys were screamin' away thru'out e show, n so was e whole audience. Those who didn't scream, i bet they weren't watchin' at all.

aft e movie, somehow, our big grp of 11 split up and took different routes to the Esplanade... anywae, we didn't reali catch e fireworks cos we were a wee bit too slow to alight fr e damn bus. We all thot e fireworks wld go off at 8.20pm cos tts e time recorded fr e previous NDP rehearsals... but at 8.15pm, when we were jus about to alight at e nx stop, we saw the fireworks on TV Mobile. GRRR. v funny rite? my toes r laughin'.

anyway, the crowd was T-E-R-R-I-B-L-E. Ivan, Joyce n I took 20 mins jus to get to the City Hall MRT fr Swissotel. unbeliveable. even my grandma doesn't walk that slowly... all bcos of e irritatin police officers patrollin e place... overcrowdin, they said.... n it's true. The crowd was so bad tt we cldn breathe... n City Link mall was stuffy n smelly. There was no trace of air-conditioning in e air at all! I guess that e body heat of e crowd over-powered e air-conditioning. Seriously, i almost died while walkin underground towards the Esplanade... o, did i mention that there were plenty of filthy molesters(bangladeshi n thai construction workers) all around? f***.

Dinner was at some roadside push-cart hawker centre a la Lau Pasar nx to Thai Express @ the Esplanade... sugar cane juice, chicken wings, fried carrot cake, fried kuay teow n hokkien mee. mmMm... standard, delicious hawker fare. Audrey, Hui Ting, Isaac, John, Mark n I were crappin durin dinner bout some Children's Aid shit... wad child abuse blah blah blah... haha... Poh Choo, Florence, Ivan, Joyce n Tim were at e nx table... u guys missed a v interestin conversation!! =P

shared a cab hm w Flor, PC n Audrey... jus as i was alightin, the three of them startin remindin me of scenes fr The Maid... u guys succeeded LaRhH!!! i was spooked out e whole nite!! ended up cuddlin w my grandma on her bed!! hell, I love her.

broken promises to myself

2005-08-09T13:01:00.000+08:00

Happy National Day everybody!!

it's a great Tuesday aftnoon! i'm supposed to workin hard on my Econs project but all i've done is chatchatchat on msn... great. n i'm supposed to b guai n stae hm all day, but i'm meetin Joyce n gang at 5pm to catch "the maid" and then go watch the fireworks.... its gonna b a great Tues nite out.. wad a sin... i'm havin 2nd thoughts bout catchin e fireworks tonite cos i'm reali jealous of all the couples in S'pore hu're gonna hv such a romantic time under the stars w their loved ones... -LoNeLyy- =(

i reali wish i cld've gone to Gotham's PentHouse last nite.. gals in bikini entered for free!! wearin a bikini to a club is such a sin... and there was bar-top dancin as well.. whOO... HOT HOT HOT!!
Shawn!!! I'm Soooo JealoUsS!! betcha had much eye-candy...!!

breakfast was chocolate milk n pancakes smeared thick w Lurpak unsalted butter, Hershey's chocolate sauce n Squeeze Me honey syrup... wad a sin... it's such a sinful Tuesday... LaLaLa!!!

~i may seem to have forgotten
i may seem to be happy and free
but don't you know, baby?
i laugh when i'm crying
and breathe when i'm dying
it still hurts whenever you come to mind~

`lonely nite...

2005-08-08T23:12:00.000+08:00

argh... nostalgia ringing in my head once again...

i still cant forget.. no matter how hard i try... WHY WHY WHY??!!

Grrr... i wan more. as in more in life. pathetic. i feel pathetic. i AM pathetic. =(

why does it hurt everytime you call my name?
why do the stars fade everytime you leave my side?
i don't want to fall in love with you...
all because you're too precious to lose.

-RAWRRR-

2005-08-08T15:23:00.000+08:00

f***ed up day. woke up late this morn... had to dig out all my certs for my APEL portfolio... was rushing thru a whole pile of rubbish jus to dig out those pathetic pieces of paper... ok, well, the certs r not reali rubbish, but the whole damn deal bout e portfolio thing is jus dumb. by e time i got to sch, APEL lesson ended. class started at 12pm. i was late by an hr.

went to meet Joyce n her babes to go to Econs lecture 2gether... 3/4 of the cohord was missing... its understandable... e lecturer sucked. from the min i stepped in he reprimanded me 3 bloody times for talkin n i got fed up n left.

it slipped my mind tt tmr's a public hol... im still fightin my conscience whether to go out n play or stay hm n mug... i'm quite broke now... savin up for Ivan's bday celebration at end mth... besides, exams r in bout 3 wks and sem break wil b here in no time... i more or less hv chosen to stae hm n be hardworking... but "the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak".

f***. 2 of my teachers called my hp 2dae cos i've been skipping classes n comin in late all e time... i hv a serious prob w punctuality... esp for sch... i seriously lack discipline. -RAWRRR-

heatbroken... very....

2005-08-07T14:25:00.000+08:00

celebrated Sweetie*Joycie's bdae on Thurs nite w Poh Choo, Florence & Ivan.... haha... the 5 of us had dinner at KFC and sang Joyce 2 bdae songs... one in Eng, one in Chi.... since we had 2 mini bdae cakes... one was fr PC n Flor.. choc i tink... n e other was strawberry mousse cake fr me!!! e two fist-sized cakes were reali cute n sweet... let me jus learn how to get my pics on my blog... im rather sua-gu... heh..

been playing pool for e past 3 consecutive daes... Thurs nite b4 Joyce's mini bdae celebration, Fri nite n Sat aftnoon... was rather 'on form' the past 3 daes.. at least i managed to beat some guys.. heh... caught Wedding Crashers w E10 & Ivan, Roy, Audrey n her frens... great show... i thot it was jus another waste-of-money-totally-predictable-chick flick, but Shawn told me to watch it n im glad we did... had a ball of a time laughin n makin funny noises in e cinema... ok... not tt kinda funny noises.... but.. yea some scenes were quite sick... no wonder it was NC-16.. not very suitable for kids.. haha...

Over the weekend, i found out alot of things... which i shall not expose at all... but let's just sae i got my heart broken, once again. The 2nd time this yr. it's either i keep falling for the wrong guys, or there's sth wrong w me... i tink it's most probably the latter. I noe this sounds stupid but yes i was stupid enuf to shed a tear or two earlier on while blasting sappy love songs on my laptop in my room... i have only one qn: WHY? WHY? WHY???

i dun tink i will ever get an answer.

anywae, Ivan was sweet enuf to come to SengKang fr his hm in Pasir Ris to take me out to dinner w his buddy Joel.... we had lotsa delicious junk food at Bedok... some hawker centre... haha... sth like chomp chomp... i stil prefer chomp chomp leh... haha stingray again some time brudder?? damn power siaz!! nx time rmb to buy a small pack of HL b4 eating stingray!!! wahaha... the three of us were crapping e whole time... haven laughed so much in so long... thanks *bro... u guys def. cheered me up... she made the rite choice huh? i support u in whatever u do okie??!! n i'll b there 4 u jus like u were there for me when i needed somebody the most... *wEEEE

JOYCE: heyz babe... i reali thank God for u.... though we jus started talkin not long ago n stuff... but we've done quite a no. of sweet stuff for each other alr within such a short period of time.. n u nv judge me, nv find any fault in me... n i feel the same wae bout u babe!! a frenship that happened out of the blue... i reali hope this closeness we share at the moment wil last for a v v long time, dearie!! hope u c this soon!! thanks for EVERYTHING so far!! hope i wil get the chance to return ur kindness!! I LOVE U BABE!!!

GLORIA & XIAO MEI: halo Gorilla n Chilli Padi!!! ya larh i noe i alwaes bully u 2 rite... but tts cos u bully me 1st!! haha... i jus wanna sae thanks for being there for me all e time!! im alwaes bugging u guys in class n aft sch also... haha.. i reali enjoy ur company... esp KTV-ing w u guys along w Joey... n funny Valerie.. haha... Xiao Mei!! i love to carry u but ur sooo heavy!! eat less larh!! muahaha... n Gloria!! if Ms Sarah Khor saes ur BeauTiFuL, U R okie??!! haha... ang-moh-faced babe.. wahaha.. Sentosa again??!! Sem break wil b here in no time n we can party like mad women..!! so study hard for now okie??!! lets motivate each other!! I lurb chu gals beri beri much!! -NOT- *HuGsS*

myPooLkaki*IVAN: heys bro... thnx for toleratin all my nonsense so far.. seriously im abit mad... haha... i noe i can get quite whiny n manja at times but u dun mind rite??!!! haha... i reali enjoy ur company.. cos ur sooo crappy n i laugh til my sides ache sometimes... heh... u 2 reali make a sweet couple!! im soo jealous larh.... hmmm guess time will heal. jus wanna thank u for simply being urself... my faithful PooL KakI!! Joel ish damn cute larh!! -hugs-

i seriously need to get started on my Econs project... im butt lazy. -RAWR- i resolute to stop clubbin n become guai-er. but i love the nite life too much. most of all, i love gettin high on drinks n dancing at parties too much. dun get me wrong, im not some havoc slut... i onli go clubbin once in a bluemoon... but i noe, thats enuf to smear the whole "guai" reputation... i need to start goin back to church. i need salvation. but tts another issue altogether. clearly, my life is screwed up.

and i noe i stand no chance at all
i noe someone else lies in ur heart
i reali shld've known my limits
call me stupid; call me foolish
cos I am a BIG IDIOT.
yes, in no time i'll b over u
over wad a fool I've made of myself
i've let the sand slip rite thru my fingers
i've let go.

i'm in LoVe

2005-08-05T11:31:00.000+08:00

hi Mr. carwasher:

i watched you from afar today
beaming under the sunshine
you took my breath away
you are a dream in a white t-shirt and berms
teach me, teach me, i could learn

i'm smitten with *itsasecret*...

writer's blog

2005-08-04T08:35:00.000+08:00

could you be my starlight on a pitch-black night?
could you be my perfection when nothing's going right?
are you some sort of a dream that i weave at night?
are you here to stay, or here to say goodbye?

writer's block.

this feeling sucks. its like sth on e inside wants to flow out of me but it cant come out smoothly.

8.35am. i hv class at 9am n i'm stil in bed. well done, sarah. i admit, i hv a prob w punctuality. i actuali woke up an hr ago. but was too lazy to move. i HATE rising early. HATE it. not a v morning person. more of an owl. slept at 2am this morn. sleepy but cldn slp. Grrrr. i skipped commskils last thurs alr... sigh. looks like i'll b missin it today too..

its rainin so heavily and though my windows are closed, i'm wearin my jacket w e hood over my head... it's unbelievably freezing...

great. complaining 1st thing in e morn. life's a bitch.

all i'm asking for is one sweet chance
i can't promise you pure happiness; i can't say forever
but i give you my word:
+i'll turn your frown upside down and put a sparkle in your eyes
+i'll be the snow-white clouds in your grey-tinted sky
+i'll be your laughter, your solace, your security, your strength, your hope, your angel
i know i could never be your everything; i'm not that great
but i could try... and i'll soothe your broken heart
there wil be times of sadness; but i'll be there to catch your tears
i'll make sure you never, ever regret this journey
hand in hand; heart to heart
just to taste that sweet smile of yours
no hasty "i love you"s
no doubtful "i believe in you"s
just silent whispers of simple truths into your life
and after all this fades into a memory
i know i will still be holding on
this may not seem right
but i know it's not a mistake
you've touched a part of my heart
now i want to touch a part of your life
i want to be the shooting star that you wish upon
and turn your harsh reality into a dream
you'll fall asleep in my gentle arms
i'll submit to you like a tender-hearted child
you could be the answer to my prayers
o, will we ever find out?
~your name is engraved on a piece of my memory~

the necessities of life

2005-08-03T21:50:00.000+08:00

jelly
bread & butter
kit kat
milk...
& a tub full of chocolate cookies.

-the necessities of life. =)

the meaning of loneliness

2005-08-03T16:50:00.000+08:00

i'm missing DahLing*Hui Ling badly. Albeit the fact i jus saw her todae. but... i'm in love w her!!!! *wEEEEE

in e lab w Ivan now... helpin him out w his project... jus finished printin all my lecture notes for e semester... its so scary... time reali flies by. 1st sem is coming to an end. "time and tide waits for no man". i truly understand the meaning of that sentence now, although i came to noe of it like 11 yrs ago... exams r jus ard e corner. i can smell frantic stress... attack of the mugger-bug. yup, i've been bitten.

not forgettin tt we'll b changin classes nx sem... i'm gonna miss everyone. no matter how much of a Love-Hate relationship i share w my class... my middle name is "sentimental".

its such a quiet, rainy and cold Wednesday evening. i miss my bro*Shawn too. he's been busy recently. no time to meet in-btw classes as usual. sigh.

=nostalgia freezing my brain=

could u b my starlight...??

2005-07-29T22:27:00.000+08:00

jus got hm... had a huge argument w my mum earlier in e aftnoon over some pathetic cheap tote bag which she handed down to my grandma that i accidentally threw away while clearing my whole fucking room. i HATE clutter. tts e reason y my rm is fucking sparse n i fucking threw awae tt bag. its ugly anywae. y e hell did she hv to make such a big fuss??

we made up eventuali. after she screamed all the vulgarities n horrible things which i did not wish to hear. she went on for about an hr. i wanted to walk out of e car. she'd wanted to send me hm, but we hardly get to spend time together so i guess she felt bad. sheesh. i tink she passed down her fucking bad/short/quick-temper to me. if someone threw awae my handbag or sth i'll prob hack the person into pieces of gory, bloody flesh.

anywaes, we got over the incident and headed down to Taka to shop.. window-shopping, to b exact. she didn wanna spend any cash. damn. there goes my topshop super-short miniskirt n Kate Spade sandals. she promised to bring me shopping if i did well for my exams though, as well as but me a few pretty pieces of formal wear for my next few presentations in sch. not bad larh... haha... we went to this Royal Copenhagen TeaHouse or sth at Taka 2nd flr... hope i got e name rite... wunderful place. had lovely English tea... hot chocolate, earl grey, scones with cream n jam, sour cherry almond cake.... yummy. i love e ambience. the ppl dining there all looked so... well-kept... or shld i sae, high-maintainance... i'm definitely goin back there for tea!!

went to fetch my grandma fr hm later in e evening n headed down to Changi Village Hotel for dinner... was craving black pepper crab n mussels so mummy brought us there for e seafood buffet!! sumptious dinner... PHWOAR. must hv gained a gazillion calories todae... =(

gtg call shawn n confirm our meetin tmr... as well as catch w my beloved grandma!!! *wEEEEE

Naughty Girl

2005-07-29T12:51:00.000+08:00

in e lab w my DahLing*Hui Ling now.... we're such NaughTy GurLs.... skipped IISO lecture for lunch... now we're jus slackin in e lab... i'm plannin to skip CMSY lecture too... but DahLing saes she wans to go... sigh... im bloody lazy. CMSY project meetin aft sch was cancelled... my mum was supposed to pick me up at 5pm, but now she's gonna b here at 2pm... hope we get to Taka then i can show her e topshop skirt which costs $73 bucks n make her buy it for me!!! *wEEEE

Daniel, Mei Mei, Hui Ling and I were discussing relationships and the qualities that we want in a bf.... o wadeva... im not reali interested in a relationship rite now... 1stly, no time... 2ndly, i dun wan any heartbreaks... 3rdly, MOST guys r jerks. i said MOST. NOT ALL. haha. besides, i'm not about to ruin any of my frenships by going steady with someone and breaking up aft that, only to realize and face the sad fact that things will never b the same again; that it'll be very difficult to remain friends.

i'm bloody full from lunch. My mum wants to have tea and dinner. I DUN WAN. cant u c the tummy's expanding??!! =(

=.i'manaughtygirl.knowntoomanythingsagirlshldnhaveknown.=

City Gurl

2005-07-28T21:13:00.000+08:00

You are a City Girl!

Whether you live in the city or not, you've got the heart of a city girl.You're up on the latest trends - what's hot in music, food, and fashion.And you love to be on the go. Your perfect day is filled with tons of fun.Your perfect guy is a city guy, so head to LA, NYC, Sydney, or London to find him!

What Kind of Girl Are You? Take This Quiz :-)

Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

meetin my mum for dinner tmr nite... hope i can get some cash outta her for shopping!! i need new clothes. badly. i've been repeating my clothes n tt feels pathetic. i soooo NEED that topshop super-short denim mini-skirt, 3/4 capri pants, another pair of sandals n kitten heels n mani mani more tops. i need to get to Shu Umera to get my eyebrows shaped again too... high-maintainance, they call it.

i'm super stressed out with sch now... projects, projects, projects... plus i need to catch up w work... i'm slacking.. lagging... sheesh. i've even got a prob w Accounts now. and when i actuali have a prob w Accounts, i noe i'm in for it. -DEAD- i NEVER have a prob w Accs. well, at least for the most part.

i did well for MacroEcons(78/100) n Accs(43.5/50) , but for IISO(20.5/40) and CMSY(19.5/40) i sucked. I'm v happi w e fact tt i actuali passed IISO, but WHY WHY WHY couldn Mr Cheong give me 1/2 more mark so tt i cld get a bloody pass??? -ouch- i lied to my mum n stepmum tt i passed all my term tests. i rounded up my CMSY marks. i'm a bitch, i noe. but a PASS sounds nicer, rite??

cant wait for e weekend!! Sat's gonna b fun. ma bro noes wad i'm talkin' bout.. shhh... haha...

+itslikeawhirlpoolofcolours.wheneverutakemybreathaway+

i admit... i m a lazy FAT pig.

2005-07-27T13:10:00.000+08:00

i'm in e Lab w *DahLing Hui Ling... tt stupid bitch... she's been insultin me ever since we went for lunch at 12pm... wad i hv flabby big arms?? wad thick waist?? wad i have to use concealer?? sigh... sometimes i reali wunder if she reali takes me as her *DahLing OR NOT... u shut up understooded?? u r a brown GoriLLa with copper-coloured fur and funny Ears. =P

finalli settled e fone bill stuff w my stepmum ystdae... she agreed to write me a full cheque for e bill, but i hv to pay her bout half of e full amt in cash. Dammit. shes bloody smart... but im grateful... at least she's payin SOME of it for me... Grrr....

i dun reali like my hair now. e style's stil e same, but the hairdresser trimmed it, gave me a thinner, lighter mane. i like e fact tt its easier to maintain n looks neater, but when i wake up in e morn i hv lotsa fly awae hair cos my hair is naturally wavy n i hv to apply Loreal's cherry-scented anti-frizz serum aft my bath to tame it. my fringe is much thinner and i dun look like a mad woman anymore. e onli down-side is that e lower-half of my hair is thinner than e top half and i look quite wierd sometimes. overall, i'm quite ok w it but i wish Rick was e one hu cut my hair. He has more affinity and chemistry w me. I rmb i was reali happi w e result when he gave me a haircut.

i'm seriously broke. Shawn, Sam, soooo sorry, but i dun tink i'll enjoy myself v much on Sat. w my horrendous spending habits, i reali wish i had a SugarDaddy. i'm becoming high-maintainence. i'm thinkin of waes to earn at least 2k durin Sem break so that i can buy some of the things that i reali reali want. fine. i admit. i'm 3/4 of a spoilt brat.

gotta rush off to Accounts lecture now.. Hui Ling has been waitin for me... we're late by half an hr!!

~will someone tell me where to find HappIness? Do I find it in a Lover's eyes, or in the blinding Sparkle of a Diamond? ~

.tired.

2005-07-26T15:44:00.000+08:00

i'm so sorry to hv neglected my blog for so long... like over a wk... sch has started alr.. last wk went by faster than the wind... into my 2nd week of Term 2... havin IISO Lab now... not supposed to b bloggin!!

met up w Sam, Debra n Jillian on Fri nite for dinner at Sakae, FiNaLLy... aft decades of plannin our ReUnIoN... then NYDC for dessert! Cookie Monster Mudpie, Ice-cream n yummy yummy Cheesecake!! Fat!! haha... yes im lookin fuller this week... my waistline fluctuates. You'll notice if u c me almost everydae. Like my *DahLing Hui Ling n ma *Bro Shawn.... oooh yes, shawn was there on Fri too... i kinda scared e hell outta him... was v v hYpEr tt nite!! haha... i hv no idae y... beats mE!?!

Went to study @ Orchard Library with *Yan on Sat.. I've missed U babe!! it's like a frenship rekindled... i nv knew we cld click SooooO well!! Rite... actuali i didn reali study... got down onli at 2pm when she n sWeeTiE *CHen Yi were alr there by 10 am!! but at least i managed to revise Lecture 7 of MacroEcons!! I cld even explain to Chen Yi all e imp points!! hahas...

aft which, we went down to Paradiz to meet ma pooL kaki *Ivan.... he was w his ex-classmate and currently in TP, *Roy... haha this ish one cute boy... chiLLi Padi!! he's small-built but he has GreAt style n he's a freakin' Dim Sum chef at Din Tai Fuk!! mmm... yummy yummy siao long baos!!!!! wahaha... my mum doesn wanna bring me there to eat... she saes its too bloody crouded n its not tt fantastic aft all. rite. i shall save e money YOU give me n go w my frens then, MOTHER!! *hmPh!!

i played one pathetic game w Roy n lost to him. aft which went to Esplanade w Yan to catch a Christian Singer's gig... if i'm not wrong she's called Debbie Fung... great singer.. reali hot too.. her Aussie accent was super strong.. cldn reali catch wad she was sayin/singin' haha... caught e NDP rehearsal's FireWorks!!! Whoohoo!! at that moment in time i wish i was with a LoVer.... all e couples there basking under the romantic fire-lit nite... hahas... but Yan n I rekindled our frenship, eh??!! We stil felt some LuRvE aft all!! wahaha....

Met a few of Yan's church-mates for dinner... w had yummy roti prata n Iced Jelly Cocktail.. I's actuali wanted to order a plate of Char Kuay Teow but Yan stopped me. She saved me fr putting on more calories... though i ws unsatisfied but, thanks anywae babe!!!! did I mention we had KFC for lunch?? popcorn chicken, Zinger, cheese fries n MUG root beer!! whoohoo!! Y the hell m I celebrating me putting on weight??!!

Anywaes, aft dinner Ivan n Roy came down to Marina to find us... we ended up walkin ard n chillin at mailto:Starbucks@Suntec.... stupid Ivan was enjoyin his Mocha venti n I was drooling. I cant take coffee, but was drooling over e Strawberries' n Cream frap! was too broke to treat myself to one.

When we decided to head back cos' I had a curfew and Roy was reali tired havin had 2 sleepless nites in a row due to camp, we realized tt due to traffic congestion in lieu of the NDP Rehearsal, the City Hall MRT was closed n we had to walk to either Bugis MRT or Dhoby Ghaut... we walked quite a distance, which ended me up in perspiration, and reached Bugis MRT but that bugger Ivan die die must get to Dhoby Ghaut.. i jus dun understand guys sometimes. So we ended up at City Hall AGAIN, got lost, n eventuali found our wae back to Dhoby Ghaut MRT... Thank God Roy n Ivan wre kind enuf to acccompany me hm, cos there's a bus to their hse at e bus stop at which I alight... haha... thanx guys!! anywae, Ivan owed me that trip for gettin us lost n makin me walk in circles ard Spore like some DuFF. haha.

I went to Church on Sundae. Can u believe it? I cant. well, it was actuali last min... i wasn reali dressed appropriately for church w my trashy hot-pink MNG top n black miniskirt, trashy sweet-pink&metal-adorned Guess? handbag n sweet-pink Tangs kitten heels. actuali went down at 11am to meet dearest Mummy for lunch n a movie but she had to rush off to Sentosa to check on some work... I reckon she was drivin her Merc. damn.

So she shoo-ed me off to church. SHE MADE ME GO. haha. but no regrets at all!! met so mani old frens, they were all so surprised to c me n my Auburn & Blonde-streaked hair... of course, i spent e dae w Yan again... finallay got to drink my Strawberries n Cream frap.. i stil LOVE Green Tea frap e best!! *wEEE

was so full when i got hm but managed to finish up all of e steak dinner tt my uncle prepared for me... how sweet of him... he's reali nice to me nowadaes... guess his PMS is over... he's 45 this yr, a yr older than my mum.... in return for e nice steak dinner (trust me, he can cook v well!!), i bought him Magnum ice-cream last nite... haha, n chocolate chip cookies n Cravio Napolitean Bar for myself!! yummy!! c... im reali gettin fat. sigh. haha...

had Fish n Chips, mushroom soup n half a hotdog durin lunch w Hui Ling n Siu Lun, my crazy MacroEcons project-mates... so bloated now.

wearin my Levi's 599, Giordano white shirt n Tangs sweet-pink heels. its rainin. ok, it jus rained. e ground is wet. wrong shoes, Sarah. tsk tsk.

gonna shop for Foundation with my DahLing *Hui Ling tmr aft sch... cant wait to spend quality time w her!! Happy 4th mth Anni, DahLing!!

goin down to Bugis now to get my hair cut n re-styled. hope e hairdresser does a great job... i wanna dye my hair Orange-Copper with Blonde highlights n pink streaks... i need money. desperately. my freakin stepmum has yet to get back to me bout setlin' my fone bill for me. RAH RAH RAH!!!!

i feel so pathetic. i m. cos im broke. what's e point of livin' if u cant enjoy life??

almost-alcoholic

2005-07-17T12:01:00.000+08:00

the party at Cocolatte on thurs nite was GrEaT! for the first time in my life, i dragged my drinks.... had a few cups of honey mix... was it scotch or vodka? anywae, i cldn taste e alcohol, onli e honey. although Ivan told me only 1/4 of e cup was honey... tt prob explains y i got kinda drunk at one pt in time... its amazing how i cld walk steadily down e stairs.. i reali hv to thank Shawn n Sharon for takin care of me tt nite!! got to noe a few nice ppl... haha... n i wun go into detail bout e dirty dancin with Yong Sheng n Sam.... anywae, i got so high tt i wasn ashamed of dancing on e podium all alone.. as in, there were of course manymany ppl squeezing on e podium, but i didn hv any frens up there w me... haha... haven danced so much in a while!! whoohoo whoohoo.. to tink tt i actuali forgot how to dance, but when e music beats its wae into ur skin, u jus get up n go n get tt booty shakin one floor... if u hv e groove, y not flaunt it?? :P

e music was realli gd at cocolatte... bumped into quite a few long-lost frens... esp Dawn... Nic's ex gf... he thinks she's a slut or sth but i dun care... she loves me n i love her... hee!! Evan's a reali sexy dancer. n her colleagues fr *Hooters* r HOT. o wells. The very drunk Ivan told me tt while i was on e podium dancin like i was on ecstacy or sth, i "zao-geng"... wth. his fren told him i was wearin black undies. rite... do i care? no... i was too tipsy to feel ashamed whatsoever... when e lights came on i was so worried tt i'd look very waste dor sth, but thank God my make up didn smudge n i looked ay-ok. my heels miraculously didn break n neither did e sole come off. im buyin e same brand of black heels in future!!!

aft e party ended i went to chill w Ivan n Gary, who is fr e same LT as me but we nv met, nv saw each other. how wierd. tts cos e naughty boy doesn attend lectures!! must attend la... cannot slack anymore man.

The three of us took a cab hm at 5.30am... was damn tired, sticky and itchy.. i shared a cab w Ivan... tt bugger lives in Pasir Ris, so since SengKang comes b4 e TPE, i got to drop first!! *wEEE haha.. when i got hm, i took a GrEaT refreshin bath, did my usual after-bath ruitine and went to bed... must have fallen aslp at 7 am or so cos surprisingly i cldn slp!! must b e hIgH i got fr dancin sooo much... heh...

woke up at 12.30 pm e nx dae... thank God i was well-rested and didn hv a hangover.. poor Ivan.. he was grumblin bout his splittin headache... BaH... look hu's e better drinker, huh??!! haha! went to Poh Chu's bdae bbq at nite... lotsa hunks n babes there... got to noe 2 sweeties, Min Qi n Sabrina... ex-IJ gals too!! *wEEE haha but they're fr SJC.. haha.. supposed to b a rival sch.. n that sexaye hot mama Isabel!! haha.. she smeared cake all over my face.. i was considered v clean cos it was onli on my left cheek, whereas e rest of e babes got it on their hair face n all over their clothes n body!! haha..

Saturdae was spent w my DahLing Hui Ling... we watched War of the Worlds, great show, Tom Cruise is stil HOT as ever... aft which she had to go off to work n i went down to J8 to meet Mich.. we ended up shoppin abit and havin dinner @ Fish&Co. @ Glass Hse... we saw Joel e singer... he is HOT HOT HOT... im in Love w him*... but found out he hangs out w this bunch of gals which dun reali like me, n e waitress hu promised to intro us to each other ignored me... BiTCh... o wadeva... there r mani mani fish in e sea.. haha... anywae, he's a reali heavy drinker n smoker n he performs at Acid Bar regularly too.. he's an owl.. haha.. guess when i turn 18 finali shall visit Acid Bar... heard so much bout tt place.. heeeZ...

n todae is ME-dae!! i dun reali wanna go out, but my uncle's gonna pick my grandma up fr church, then we're headin to my cousin's new place for lunch. I HATE GOIN OUT ON SUNDAYS. thats one of e reasons y i DUN WANNA GO TO CHURCH... my mum wants me to go back. nx wk probably. we'll c.

o wells. gotta go get ready to go out. I'm bloody lazy. Can't wait for Sem break!! clubbing is a sin. reali.

~ hOneY mIx n pEaCh bRanDy AddIcTion ~

Term Break RawkZ

2005-07-14T16:50:00.000+08:00

its been 7 days... term tests r over; term break's finally come... and soon it'll b gone... y does time fly by suuuper fast?? 24hrs a dae is not enuf for all of us.

dreading term test results... i made a promise to myself to quit playin and b hardworkin when sch reopens... but guess i'm too wilful to stick to tt.

e week went by like PhWoAr... played pool w Daniel and the guys fr E10 on Fri aft CMSY Term Test... finally learnt how to break the triangle... haha

accompanied Shawn on Saturday morning for his haircut... he has grey highlights on his black-based hair now... cool huh?? mayb i shld try tt colour haha... but im afraid of dryin out my hair further if i dye it continuously... o bother... conditioner doesn seem to work for me anymore.. haha... Had a great laugh with Ivan, Shawn n Sam at Starbucks at P.S... aft which, i won Ivan at pool at Paradiz!! whoohoo!! but im stil v lousy. bleaghs.

Sunday, as usual, is ME-day... rittin at hm, lazing ard on my bed w my wunderful laptop.. wahaha.. had e horrible Accounts Test on Monday aftnoon... i wonder why it had to b held in the aftnoon... irritating... i made a careless mistake!! there goes my distinction for Accounts... met my mum to watch Initial D. it was my 2nd time. didn enjoy e movie as much as e 1st time.. e movie ends todae. aft which, we had dinner at Fish & Co at Glass Hse... had seafood platter and lemon garlic butter mussels... and a thick ice-blended chocolate! yummy!! she reprimanded me for wasting food. "yes, i may be rich, but u dun jus spend money like water n waste food u noe? i work hard for my money u noe? do u noe how mani ppl r out there struggling for even jus one meal a dae?? dun take things for granted, Sarah!" i felt so bad. seriously. okie mummy... i promise, i wun waste food or take things for granted anymore larHH!!!

Tuesday was spent with Sam n Shawn... rushed down from my stepmum's office to meet them ard 4.30 pm... was supposed to shop for a new skirt... tried on this sUUUpeR short skirt at topshop... $73 bucks... i love it!!! but there were 2 reasons y i didn buy it.. 1stly, too ex... 2ndly, Shawn discouraged me cos it's bloody hell too short!! another inch shorter n u cld c wad colour im wearin!! if u noe wad i mean.. heehee... but I want tt skirt!! Topshop shall b my first stop on my nx shppon spree!! had dinner at Marche, then Sam left, so Shawn n I decided to play pool at Paradigm... great. thats when i realized i was reeeeali lousy cos Shawn's chao gd n I cldn even pod a single ball. whatever la. practice makes progress-by Michael Jordan. wahaha.

went suntanning w Hwee Ling, YingXiu, Valerie n pretty pretty Gloria yesterdae!! whoohoo!! haven been suntanning in a yr!! i love u babes!! esp Hwee Ling!! my bikini partner!! hee!! now i'm like sunburnt n red like a cooked crab. my skin hurts a little whenever there's friction. o bother. but i love e wae my skin looks now!! baked reddish brown!! jus developed e beautiful photos now... Cant wait til nv nv Sat!! Sentosa again, sweetie Hwee Ling??!! Love ya lots babe!! *muAcKzZ*

n tonite, im meetin Rosemary for dinner n then goin to CocoLatte to club.... whoohoo!! e last time i clubbed was like 2 yrs back?? haha... hope i stil hv e ability to groove to e music!!

i'd better go dress up n get ready to go out now!! meetin Rose at 7pm!! I'm so excited!! *wEEEE

movi3 maniAc

2005-07-06T11:55:00.000+08:00

jus woke up not long ago.... BLISS. i slept to my heart's content this morning. wanna go make cheese omelette again for lunch!! but im on a bloody diet. gotta get into shape for nx week!! there r so many things i wanna do during Term Break!! suntanning with e babes, movie marathon, KTV with Mei Mei and Joey again, play pool like it's free, the party @ Coco Latte on Thurs, catch up with my babes.....

Phwoar. I'm gonna be broke. It's onli e beginning of e mth n i'm broke alr. I desperately wanna catch War of the Worlds, A Lot Like Love, Initail D(again) & Mr and Mrs Smith..... not forgettin tt *Bewitched and The Island r comin up!!! whoohoo... i'm considerin going on a lonesome movie marathon todae... everyone's studyin for CMSY. n i'm supposed to b also.... but... i'm LAZY. kk. shall b GUAI and stae hm all dae "studyin"...

had home-made Laksa last nite... my uncle followed the recipe passed down by my grandma... it was shiok, but no one can cook like my grandma... perhaps in time to come, I'll be able to!! oops... BHB....muahaha.

did i mention?? there's this reeeaallii CUTE guy livin on e 8th flr.. I know he's fr TP, cos he took e same bus as me fr e same bus stop... it's a pity i dunno his course... u know... I live in a rather secluded estate, and it's v rare to find someone fr TP livin in e same blk as me... yes, when we alighted at e same bus stop, I was delighted, and to think tt we wld end up walkin e same path all e wae hm!!!!! and ended up takin e same lift... and tts y i noe he lives on e 8th flr.... I actuali got out of e lift first cos i live on e 5th story, but was smart enuf to observe where the lift wld stop... yea... like some crazy stalker... but he's reeaaallii cute!!! haha... n its so rare tt i actuali noe someone hu lives in my blk... though i dun reali noe him at all, but i'm sure we'll b fated enuf to meet somewhere again!! haha... o no... mayb he has a gf??!! haha... im jus kiddin... i've onli seen him twice... yea... =D

I'm so excited!! My SugarPuff's gonna be partyin nx Thurs w me!!! ok, prob not at e same club, but most prob she'll b at Boat Quay and i'll b jus ard e corner at Robertson Quay... it'll b our "first nite out"!!! haha...

okie.... gonna go cook my omelette now....

I knew my diet wldn happen.

~HaPPi3~!!!

2005-07-05T21:00:00.000+08:00

4th July, Monday: MacroEcons test. e paper was alrite... wasn't as difficult as i expected it to be... although the last two heavy-weightage qns WERE on lecture 6, which i had no time to study at all (actuali i did hv time; but if u refer to my profile, it states that i am "intelligent yet LAZY")... so, i did study for econs aft all, and thankfully i could do most of them qns and was able to draw the very imp graphs!! i hv a feelin i'll pass... but do well?? maybe not, babeh.

Today: was supposed to get up at 4.30am this morn to do LAST MIN studyin for IISO... but i failed. the weekend was spent broodin over the up-and-coming-and-already-here Term Tests, and I ended up sleepin at 1am on Sunday due to last min studyin for MacroEcons... and to my own surprise, I actuali had that much DISCIPLINE, which i totali lack, to get up at 8am the nx morning to study before the Econs test at 2pm. so there. at least i'm confident of a pass!!

Due to the lack of slp, i hit the sack at 11pm last nite when i had actuali planned to burn the midnight oil again... b4 i drifted awae to slumberland, i set my super-loud alarm at 4.30am so that i cld wake up and study IISO b4 e paper at 9.30am... i actuali did manage to wake up for just a min at 4.30am, but gave in to my fatigue. up to date, I hv not studied a single page of IISO. e qns were rather straight forward and simple, and definitely not as difficult as i thot they'd be, and had i studied, or at least read thru, i wld manage to at least obtain a pass. so eventuali, i got up at 7am, reached sch by 9am, and spent 1/2 hr flippin calmly thru my lecture notes, obviously unable to retain any info at all. guess i was prepared to fail. and yes, i AM goin to fail. o, whatever. There goes my Diploma in Merit.

but im feelin suuuper happi now cos aft IISO term test, my class n i went to Pavilion to play pool!! after playin bout 5 rounds or so, i got bored and left for K-Box downstairs for some LALALA with Mei Mei and Joey!!! a pity Gloria wasn there... we had so much fun!!!! i jus sang my FILL and prob scared the nerves outta Joey with my low, husky and loud voice!!! HAHA.. my chinese, i realize, ish improving!!!!!!!!!! *wEEEEEEEEEEE

GUYS, WE GOTTA DO THIS AGAIN SOMETIME!!!!!!!!!!!!

TERM BREAK WILL RAWK!!!!!
with all my activities planned, I CAN"T WAIT!!!!!!!!!! whoohooo!!!!

brain dead:i'm dead

2005-07-03T15:40:00.000+08:00

rite... wad m i doin online again??!!

im tryin my best to absorb lecture 3 of macroecons into my brain... which is kinda dead btw... actuali sleepin.. im sooo sacred for term tests. my god. onli God can save me now. its too late!! i stil have 4 lectures to complete studyin!! and wad about IISO??
3 bloody long chapters!! and there r onli 3 qns for IISO, which are to be completed in 1hr 30min, which simply means that each qn is gonna b bloody difficult!!!!!!!!! im jus so dead larhh.

met michelle to study fr 12-4pm yesterdae, then went tampines to meet YingXiu... n guess wad? we ended up chatting and yacking awae... until 10pm.... n i was supposed to burn e midnite oil last nite.... was smsing YingXiu around 12am in bed last nite n i didn even last til e 3rd sms.. so guess my midnite plans failed.

and here i m bloggin awae. i wish someone wld confiscate my laptop. i have far too many distractions... argh.

STUDY STUDY SARAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

from the heart

2005-07-01T10:21:00.000+08:00

i have found the answer as to what makes my heart soft, calm and simply,purely happy.

this morning, i woke up at an amazingly early hour on my own (usuali my grandma has to kick me outta bed)... probably cos i slept amazingly early as well!! Been havin wierd feelings these few nites.... haven been sleepin well.. but last nite, i cldn slp so decided to sms shawn n i didn even last til the 5th msg... haha... anywae, back to the topic..

i got up, took a bath and did all my usual stuff, and then got down to cooking!! i made a cheese-sausage omelette for myself, and two fried sausages and two sunny-side-ups for my beloved grandma!!!!!! in addition, i made a margarine toast for each of us. *WEEeeee

I woke my grandma up, and surprised her w e wunderful breakfast!! and we sat down together, ate together, and i jus admired her while she sipped her coffee and nibbled on the sausages... i had my fresh milk... i love MILK.. haha... jus lookin at her enjoying a simple meal that was cooked by me makes me smile. from the heart. jus pure happiness and contentment.

I Love You, Mama.

great. term test is in 3 days n despite havin drawn up a timetable to supposedly motivate myself to study, i have not done a single thing. tsk tsk. I am the Queen of Procrastination.

o, and GUESS WAD?? Sindee darling jus called me to remind me that commskills class starts at 10am instead of 12pm todae!! wth.. but whatever. i had an enjoyable morning with my grandma.. and the kitchen!! shall leave e worryin to ltr.. i feel so bad havin to ask Sindee lie for me.. o wells... i'm prob gonna hv to repeat commskills for a semester.. O NO!!! i'm actuali reali scared la ok...

i'd better end here... need to dress up n get outta e hse by 11am.... *mUaCkZz*

I am the Queen of Procrastination

2005-06-28T14:41:00.000+08:00

I jus drew up a pathetic timetable to motivate myself to study. Counting fr today, there are only 6 days left til' term tests commence... 6 super short, super tiring, super stressful daez.... E timetable was done during CMSY lecture. Great. I obviously have not been paying attention again.

I'm down w nasa infection again... e germs are so cruel!! out to make me feel horrible and terribly ill.... im losing my voice again... my throat hurts like shit... n my nose keeps running... wtf... i hv to stop eatin chocolates n all things nice n sweet until i fully recover again!!! o bother... it's all my fault.. didn finish my anti-biotics e last time... btw, i get this nasal infection almost every month...God forbid... there was one remaining ugly, smelly capsule n i refused to down it. I feel horrible now!! I need e doctor again... more pills, more tissue... great. just in time for term tests n term break... i'd better c e doc soon cos i need to b physically fit for my tests n various activities happening in e coming hols!!

Sarah!!! *slapslapslapslapslap* stop procrastinating!!! yea, sure... and wad m i doin?? Blogging awae... As we all noe, the key to success is DISCIPLINE.

And i lack it.

I dread the Term Test results.

dead

2005-06-26T14:02:00.000+08:00

i reeeeali wonder how some sacry spooks alwaes manage to find their wae to my blog even aft i've MOVED... my god... dun u get e msg? U r not welcome here.... we may hv been 'frens' many many yrs ago but not anymore i guess.. its like everyone whom i noe tt noes u doesn reali like u... hope u noe hu u r man...

anywae, as alwaes, i dun update my blog on a regular basis... sometimes i rmb.. but im too lazy... sometimes i jus dun hv e time... term test is drawing nearer n nearer every second... i can feel e walls closin in on me as the days pass... im reali reali freaked out... term test consists of a rather big percentage of course work, hence if u fail it, u'll prob fail ur coursework and b de-barred fr e exam... then ull hv to take e supplementary paper when everyone's enjoyin n realaxin n partyin awae... n u HAVE to pass it. if u dun, happy repeatin tt particular subject for another semester, aft everyone ard u has graduated...

n e thing is, u wil nv get into e Director's Honours List and get a Diploma with Merit... Shawn told me. Uh-ho.

i pray and hope for nothing but e best to come my wae... im reali tryin to concentrate now n absorb all the CMSY info.... its a killer subject. I stil hv 3 more subjects to worry about. o god. im prayin i can chiong in peace durin term break!!

rite now, im actuali racking my half-dead, lazy n extremely sleepy brain on how to start on that ridiculous 600-900 word piece of expository writing.. n i thot it was all over aft e 'O's... looks like i was wrong. im in for it. My writing skills hv all been thrown outta e window n i cant seem to find and gather em back. I need inspiration... chocolates? a sense of fulfilment? him? nothing seems to b able to get my ass going!!

i haven been penning any poems/songs like i used to. n now i dun even noe wad to crap about on this blog.

this is wad u call writer's block. or so i think.

DEBRA: hey babe... i noe we haven met up in awhile n we've both been busy.... cant waitta meet up during my term break!! u noe i love u... i miss our class 4/4 v v much... life in poly is fun n e frens r fine but nothing beats my GAL PALS -U n Cheryl... dun let anyone bully u k... u noe hu im talkin bout... e one u told me bout on e phone.. haha... hope ur doin good.. let's go Pasta Mania kk??!! Yummy!!!! Cant wait!!! *sMuCkZz*

NURUL: halo babe!! thnx for comfortin me on sat nite.. i reali needed those words of encouragement... dun b so pessimistic... ur a great fren!! i mean it... n thnx for promising to keep my secret... tt prob i told u bout... stil v hurt... haiz but guess i shld jus let go n let nature take its course.. i guess time wil heal.. love u... rmb i hv to cook pasta n eggs for u hor!! wahaha... c u!!

been feelin reali down n hurt... in one super short week, so many things happened. i reali regret some things, n i wish things didn end up e wae they did so far... but sometimes i reali dunmean to do or sae e things i do... external factors make me react the wae i do... o... wil someone pls understand??

nostalgia is my solace.... e memories of frens n e happy times we shared... e tears n laughter we've all been thru together... i love u Cheryl n Debra.... i miss u.

My New Layout Rawkz

2005-06-21T14:25:00.000+08:00

so... how'd u guys find my new layout man??
spent so much time on it... n i'm so proyd of it!! lovin' it.... esp e poem on e 'cover' page.... though it was written within 5 mins, but guess it expresses everything i feel... if u noe wad i mean..

i'm in IISO Lab now... damn boring... but im enjoying the aircon n e com.... fingers flying across e keyboard, happily blogging awae... Derrick's voice is piercing my left ear... he's so noisy.. irritating me... n i jus told Siu Lun off AGAIN.... for teasing me bout Ivan... ya... shut up la guys.. wahaha...

i'm so proud of myself... i actuali handed in a well-written report on Human Resource Management on Sunday at bout 6.30pm... haha... though it was damn last min... but i'm a lazy bum. at least im honest!

i miss my Sugarpuff!! Sindee must b jealous cos i wrote Tezel a letter but i didn write to her...

SINDEE: Ger ah!! dun jealous okie!! hee... i said i lub chu e most!!!!!!!!!!! Weeeeeee!!!!!!*=X

NURUL: U LOVE my new skin rite?? u love me rite?? haha.... =D u know wad i love?? Muslim food!! yummy!! wahaha i cook PASTA n CHEESE omelette for u one day okie?? soon soon!! Yummy!!...

Stressed out

2005-06-19T11:13:00.000+08:00

it's been 5 days since i last blogged.... tts cos ive been reali busy.. ok, i admit i still hv not completed everything on my to-do list, but at least ive been trying!

Term test is in 2 wks time, and up to date i hv no idea about CMSY... IISO n MacEcons shld be pass-ible, n i'll hang myself if I dun SCORE in BAccs... Rite, u can say ive an affinity with numbers... but definitely not IT!!

Last Friday, i got ticked off by a 3 of my classmates... shall not mention names, but they did it in a rather tactful manner, n i believe their intention was to enlighten me so that i wld b a better friend/person... come to think of it, i reali appreciate them and their words... true friends tell u ur faults so that u may change for the better.. though i was kinda hurt, but all's well btw us n things r back to normal.. i'm jus thankful they've been v understandin, n thank god for my humility.

anyhow, the past week was spent mostly rushing thru projects, with huge bouts of laughter in btw.. I dunno bout the others, but in e process, i got to noe n understand my classmates a lil better.. n i grew to appreciate n love them more... yes, i admit... i get bitchy when agitated, my face turns coal-black when im stressed up, but when i get high on laughter there's no way to bring me down!! so i jus wanna sae, i reali dun mean it when i get bitchy or grumpy sometimes... i cant help my mood swings.. all i noe is i'm totali in LOVE with E09!! n im tryin hard to cool my hot-temper... so pls, a lil patience everyone? =)

met Cheryl for dinner last nite.. surprisingly, i didn gorge myself crazy at Seoul Garden @ Taka.. guess it was cos I was too excited n happy to see Cheryl.. my angel girl.. i love her to bits.. it was her b'dae ystdae.. n i gave her a card which expressed all my love, encouragement n gratitude towards her.. Hilmi n Cheryl r a too-sweet couple.. i'm so jealous!! no la... but Cheryl's always been blissfully attached since i got to noe her, n my love life consists of onli a fling here n there, n a few serious bfs.. i guess i'm alwaes fallin for e wrong guys.. e bad boys, e flirts.. o, whatever. let's not go deeper into that.. esp now tt im tryin to get my mind off someone.. see? wrong guy again... grrrr...

went for dance auditions at 9am ystday... dun think i'll b selected... there were soooo many ppl watchin us dance row by row, n e coach was holdin a pen n paper, prob markin down e names of those hu cld dance, n neglecting e failures, such as myself.. yea but guess wad?? when i got hm, put down my bag n started dancing the steps we were taught in front of e mirror, i did it almost perfectly! i can dance man... but.. guess nervousness n fear of embarrassment got e better of me.. i jus wanna kill myself. I LOVE DANCE!! but there's no point cryin over spilt milk. e onli thing i can do now is pray n hope tt they'll select me.. if they dun, i'll prob join floorball or dragon boating.. hope its not too late.. i jus need to keep fit!!

munching on lemon shortbread cookies fr Crabtree&Evelyn n sipping on Magnolia milk... yawning awae on my bed, e pillow enticing me to rest my head on its body.. fingers flying across e keyboard.. brain narrating words for me to type out.. im tired.. but i cant rest.. hv to hand in IISO project Part 1 online by todae!! call me lazy, a pig, useless, senseless.. yes, discipline is e remedy..

and i lack it - GREATLY.

REVIVAL..its like coming back fr e dead...

2005-06-14T21:41:00.000+08:00

My god.. i nv expected to b able to set up a fresh blog... this feels so gd... bloggin away on my laptop.. its been a reeeeeli long time man.... i jus hv so much to sae... Siu Lun's gonna help me set up some hyperlink stuff.. im plannin to put up a pg where u guyz can read bout my life.. as in, well, my reasons 4 changin blog address n e answers as to y im feelin so liberated.. hur hur. n, if im not too lazy, n if i hv e time, i mite put up a pg full of dedications!! yes yes i lurb dedications.. its time i told e world how much i lurb them!!

Anyway, as i've mentioned, it's a fresh new blog, fresh new path in life, fresh new leash of life,fresh new sch in TP, fresh new circle of frenz... albeit a 'fresh' new plumper body.. ok, well, perhaps im exaggerating on e weight gain.. but havin been degenerated into a slacker ever since aft e 'O' levels, i reali feel 'meatier'!! I wld love to sae it's e boobs, n im glad to sae part of e meat lies in e butt (i finally do not see a totally flat behind), thankfully its not e legs, but i guess e bulk of e meat (or fats, to b honest) gathers ard my waist!! O bother... it'll take a truckload of self-discipline b4 i put on my bikini again!!

Apart fr such fatty issues, I reali hv to sae... I actuali miss sch durin e weekends!! no no baby, not e boring lectures, tedious lab sessions n mentally/physically-draining tutorials.. i miss e class -AWWW- n e hustle n bustle of TP BIZ Sch.. ive made a few reali lovable frens, oggled at a few (okok, alot) of cuties n hunks n caught up w some old frens.. i was so surprised at e presence of a few long lost loved-ones.. n even one or two ex-bfs.. my class is a vessel of laughter.. seriously, we're e onli ones u can hear during lecture... n come to think of it, u can hear us a street awae.. n we nv stop smilin, nv stop teasin, nv stop talkin... n im reali blessed w such barrels of laughter.. e support n encouragement we lend one another.. e joy we pass on to others like lighting unlit torches... tts wad makes sch MISS-a-ble!!

N u may think im crazy, but i've come to understand y workin adults wld rather stae hm durin e weekends than walk ard Orchard Rd onli to b pushed n shoved in e midst of e mad crowd.. Sch life in Poly can get tiring at times.. n not to mention stressful... i'm startin to break out in cold sweat (and unfortunately, pimples) at e thought of jus merely passing my CMSY n IISO tests n exams... almost broke down todae... i love A/Cs n Econs, so those 2 shld b No Problemo.. o yes, n e dreadful projects n deadly deadlines.. argh... -RAAAAH- im gettin all stressed up again.. n so, i've decided tt catching up w frens n clubbing, n all other FUN stuff shld b out-of-touch until e long-awaited hols.. yes, im gonna study during e WEEKENDS!! There goes my shopping sprees n fancy dinners.. let's jus sae i'll try. -ahem-

I reali do not noe how to end off, but i had so many things in mind to type out tt i've forgotten wad else to sae.. o wells.. e rest wil come ltr i guess.. havin a splittin headache.. must b e humidity. n not enuf water.

SINDEE: hey babe.. thnx 4 all e advice n encouragement u've been givin me... i reali appreciate ur support n treasure this frenship!! the last 4 weeks knowin u hv been great... u were e 1st fren i made in class, 1st person to snap a peekture w me on my new HP, e 1st person i go to whenever i need a listenin ear.. im sori if ive let u down in some ways... but everythin in life consists of ups n downs... all we need to noe is, though its been jus a mth of frenship, there's a lifetime to come.. i love u!! -HUGS-

Siu Lun, Derrick, Daniel, Philson, Ivan: U guys r one of my first male classmates, havin been fr an all-girls' sch... U totally RAWK!! though i can b bitchy @ times n pathetically lame, life in E09 wld reali b incomplete w/o u... so lets treasure our time in class 2gether n i reali look 4ward to more bouts of laughter ahead w u guys!! hee!!

Shi Jia: Thanks 4 e JJ Lin tics babe!! love ur pedicured toenails!!

Nurul n e rest of e babes: too cute la... *muacks*

e rest of E09: I love u guys!!! Pls nag me to study hard!!! =P

test test

2005-06-14T21:25:00.000+08:00

-bleep- testtest.